Tag: Donald E. Westlake

The SFFaudio Podcast #888 – READALONG: Bank Shot by Donald E. Westlake

Jesse, Scott Danielson, Maissa Bessada, and Misha Burnett talk about Bank Shot by Donald E. Westlake

Talked about on today’s show:
everybody knows their places, the 2nd Dortmuner novel, Bank Shot, the movie adaptation, DNFed that thing, it existed on dvd, just to confirm, be completist, artificial eyebrows, a record for biggest eyebrows, stunt eyebrows, very cartoonish, the broad characterization, pretty close, the money is on fire, the vocab word that best applies to Dortmunder is hapless, luckless, hap means luck, what happend, Maissa?, I’m feeling really happy, luck’s been with with me today, happenstance, how did it fall out?, what went wrong?, character and cartoonish, Herman X, we’re looking at his menu, a negroni, black beans, everything added to the menu is black, how black is he? even his drink is black, just so funny, movies out of Westlake stories, I’m a movie maker, make a great book into a good movie, it almost never works, what killed the movie?, they didn’t follow the book, starts with him in prison, something ridiculous, Upjohn Ballantine, a Dukes of Hazard kind of a way, where you buy the name of the book, they did pass a bank that was in a trailer, the temporary bank was in a trailer, the acting was horrible, melodramatic, one of the actors was Boss Hogg, the fake lawyer that came in to visit, Karp, he’s in one of the James Bond movies, that boy’s out there doing it again, it’s like a movie, this would make a terrific movie, why deviate, this is dead on, the scriptwriter complains about the movie, the film failed due to the direction, never truely done justice to Westlake, slightly tilted, a charming idea, stealing the whole building, into a farce, a marvellous stage director, simply wasn’t deft, ruined what I thought was a good piece, bitterly disappointed, it doesn’t translate, it’s so careful, it seems to flow super easy, everything is funny and fun, and endless mistake, you can’t quite do it, it is the way it is told, a lot more cops, great stuff, up on a hill, mobile headquarters, too much coffee and danishes, want some?, aiming to do what is done in the book, it doesn’t translate to film that well, Brer Rabbit, the Uncle Remus stories, these are cartoons, Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck, talking animals betraying each other, a pixar style movie, it works best as a book, Shakespeare is not a novel, when you see Shakespeare performed, you can’t mess with it too much, performed on stage is where it is, location shooting, Westlake lives in the text, he doesn’t live in the plot, his character direction that’s the fun part, betting on cards, two sixes, the whole thing’s moving, too long as a movie, the movie adaptation of A Travesty, A Slight Case Of Murder (1999), a cat just knocked over a bunch of things, James Cromwell, accidentally murders his girlfriend, blackmails him, told first person, breaks the fourth wall, points his funny face towards the camera, a comic murderer, pack in all the plot, knock over a bank, why the book is good, how deftly he handles it, The Blonde Lieutenant, the reason Dortmunder is called Dortmunder, worked as a “snow top”, white helmeted Air Force police, he’s filling in the little details there, a blog, the car crash, smutty books in the back, those were all Donald Westlake, the etext, dig around, the complete dot txt, you jammed on your, Kelp, the Pinto, a row of stores on the right, an alley between the two of them, the storage area, full of paperback books, one was called Passion Doll, Man Hungry, Strange Affair, Off Limits, Call Me Sinner, Apprentice Virgin, his topcoat flapped, you were talking about the cops, why don’t you bums get off the road, what you’re gonna get is cops, every character in this book is him or somebody he knows, he’s Dortmunder but also the cousin, making radio dramas, all the pulp magazines, he wasn’t a regular cop, aspects of his own life, scold you, insurance is in this book, multiple times, an insurance scene, two many knees in the way, observational humour, Merch’s mom, the getaway driver, he’s a car thief, his mom is the cab driver, the pinto, an AMC Javelin, making noises as if it had just eaten a Pinto, making fun of everything, he doesn’t stop, a spinoff of his hardboiled series [the Parker series], come in on the seconds, the seconds are better, a heist, something goes wrong, a revenge book, writing The Hot Rock, getting too silly, leaned into that, being hapless, on the Donald E. Westlake, what’s the one that’s on the SFFaudio website, “I believe my subject is bewilderment”, insurance is a hedge about the bad things happening, that’s this whole book, what can go wrong now?, just pushing what could go wrong, teetering on the edge, very improv, and and and, Castle In The Air, many turrets, a megastructure, what a novel is, what’s going to happen next?, where’s Westlake getting all this, out of his life and his observations, they use the book as the template, what they’re lack is the Westlake, lacking the central core material is him, painting in the characters, vignettes as well, build the scene up and have the rug pulled out, the number of Parker movies, Dortmunder movies, they’re all bad, getting it right never works, they can’t do what the book is doing, a Terminator or an andorid, programmed to do stuff, need sleep or something like that, producing the results, doesn’t do anything that’s inefficient, it’s not science fiction, Data goes back in time on some planet, a character who has no personality, in a film you wouldn’t, Mel Gibson, Robert Duvall, Lee Marvin, Jason Stathem, none of these are hits, they take the template and it doesn’t fit, a book writer, The Stepfather, different and dark in tone, a screenplay for The Grifters, Jim Thompson, hits you like a bag of oranges, really bad and good, a writer’s writer, it is astounding, they flow so easy, the characters are great, the dialogue is fantastic, Michael Kramer is so good, just playing, playing out beautifully, when a paperbook goes out of print, a new version, a new cover, new formatting of the pages, it will have a new font, garamond, my favourite, the Frank Muller collection, I’ll read any Frank Muller book, George Guidall, Bronson Pinchot, too performy, what else has he narrated, to become a chameleon, from Eastern Europe accent, as an actor would, George Guidall narrated Dune is the best version, saved this from cassette, almost none are available, the entire Parker run, the Dortmunder run, he was excellent, the epic fantasy nowadays, super popular for that, The Wheel Of Time series, Brandon Sanderson stuff, a little Wikipedia entry, starting in the 1990s, other ones we could do, a Stark, The Man With The Getaway Face, they’re all drop in, The Axe, fantastic book, No Other Choice (2025), the Koreans would do a good job, you will want to, the premise, laid off, fun fun name, drastic cost cutting measures, the 7 men who could take the job, it’s brilliant, William H. Macy, told from the point of view of this person doing horrible things, brings it tight, ensemble pieces, Robert Redford and 6 other actors, a heist, bring it in tight to the one guy, a French version, a Michael Caine version (not an official version), really new, not hit the services yet, Ebert’s site gave it 4 out of 4, Oldboy (2003), are we bringing in Misha Burnett?, a little awkward, working so many hours, traveling for work, sometimes on a Sunday, Bank Shot as a sequel and the foundation of a series, the franchise starts with the 2nd, an excellent example for people, expanding one book into a series, what to keep, what to show, the comic caper genre, prior to Westlake, he basically invented that, the background of The Hot Rock, too goofy for Parker, needed a character, Dortmunder’s confederates, builds such an incredible cast of secondary characters, in every single book, and May, Victor, extraordinary, the person who got me hooked on Westlake, a homosexual encounter, deciding whether he’s going to have sex with a man or a woman tonight, from the outside it looks just like an ordinary garage, foolin around together, he’s a fanboy of radio drama, he’s not looking for sex, dissatisfaction with eh FBI, never even held a submachine gun, he’s very self-aware, secret lair, comin out the the pulp era, drawing from it, did a lot of science fiction as well, the caper itself follow the outline or precedent set in The Hot Rock in being over the top, you know… I bet, Drowned Hopes, the undertow’s got it, a valley that’s gonna be flooded, rob the bank that’s under the water, one of Westlake’s truly chilling villains, in prison for 20 years, they dammed the lake and drowned the village, blow up the dam, kill a whole bunch of people, something Stark would consider, scuba gear, what could go wrong?!, his secondary characters, the cops, that scene, the safe company, the trailer company and the bank, just like on the edge, how far to push a caricature and keep it believable, on the borderlands of a cartoon, something went wrong in the process, we got all these great actors, Robert Redford is not Dortmunder, George C. Scott would have made a great Parker, Gary Oldman [Gary Coleman], Dortmunder is us, we seeing him on screen, muppets might work, that hyper-realized, just Michael Caine is the bank manager, way on down the series, taking out the casino in Vegas, a lock man, you have to be able to introduce characters, ancillary character, Nobody’s Perfect, Good Intentions, scamming encyclopedia, the phone went tick tick tick, two small ticks, arguing with Kelp, I wonder who they’re after, rear ending the car with the books in the trunk, pseudonymous sex books, Adios Scheherazade, a left handed guide to how to write or how not to write, be a real writer, wants to be a real boy, friend with a spy series, his ideas end up petering out and going nowhere, really sad, how sad it is, The Hook, it’s about Amazon, well before Amazon, hot writer, best seller, once you’re in the system you can never grow past a certain point, I’m gonna put my name on your book, a murder sort of story, he’s better at standalones than he is at series, even when he has a noble failure, Humans, we have more possibilities, thank you for your time, something Simaky, Ring Around The Sun, in about a month, building a carwash, good listening time, 10 – 12 hour days, painting a room, commuting is a big deals, if you’ve got a good book, your arms and your neck and your back, I’ll go in tomorrow I got six more chapters, almost like a drug, makes the time go by so fast, miss my exit, where the series really come in handy, even with Westlake, they’re premium, his Grofield books, not more Parker, they’re adventure, 3 Grofield books, The Dame, The Blackbird, Lemons Never Lie, a job that’s gone sour, Slayground, Parker went into the amusement park, a split, two different experiences, insurance, seeing it all the time, the bank being insured, a real funny subtle one, and you’ll have access, our researchers in Omaha, Nebraska, Anguilla?, a non-fiction account of a coup there, Under An English Heaven, the photograph of him on Wikipedia, the thesaurus, in the news happening, Chernobyl, what would God make of all of this, a bet against the future, Scott Adams, Pascal’s Wager, convert to Catholicism on my deathbed, Somebody Owes Me Money, sitting at the table, some way he can make it pay for him, there’s gotta be a way, this game, getting some food at Walmart, a ricecooker, do you want insurance on that, a $20 item, we don’t get that extra profit, gameifying, take maximum money from suckers, The Handle, a casino off of Cuba, saving up money for his summerstock, since been confirmed, the criminals don’t think of themselves as criminals, a sideline, their real business is something else, Victor is not representative of a stock character, representative of that kind of thinking, he collects cars or something, whatcha doin, the tape’s still going, of the heist while it is happening, the plots, the premise, it’s all about the character touches, had been an MP, a regular day job, health and house decisions, spending am lot of time thinking, using every part of the animal, that kind of treatment, just let me go get my purse, playing Dortmunder, this is a scam, she’s tipped to it relatively early on, only $10, keep talking, meeting again, a slot, put a Parker in there, The Handle, Don’t Ask, Stark stuff, the comedy, formulaic, when you know it is a continuing character, his standalones, The Fugitive Pigeon, the nephew novels, Trust Me On This, the National Inquirer, Baby Would I Lie, Branson, all built up, it’s a Tom Selleck style actor, used to be on a tv show, mystery detective, lives in Los Angles, Samuel Holt, the pseudonym and the character, Paul Kavanaugh by Lawrence Block, One Of Us Is Wrong, didn’t finish it, would have paid more attention, him under a pseudonym, do what he’s doing in The Hook, Stephen King with Bachman, I get these numbers in the mail, his script writing career, been to Florida a few times, Kenya, Kahawa, coffee smugglers, mercenaries, dangerous people, Westlake fans were horrified, very well written, a feel for the utter insanity that was Uganda under Idi Amin, Two Much, other than the premise, seems like it is a light comedy, one pair of the twins out, twins was the whole point, a French adaptation, they don’t play it up, he’s a fuckin horrible murderer, did a show on it not too long ago, give away the ending, like a huge kick in the balls, the last line, sent a joke, I don’t get it, he’s lost his sense of humour, in order to gain all of the money, didn’t really hit me until later, he’s very mature, it’s not manipulation because you don’t feel it, it all gelled, it all worked, never gonna have a sequel to that, The Hunter, Point Blank, the first Parker book is bad, the least best Westlake books, even his noble failures are good, Ed Topless, disses it, a good movie, not a Westlake movie, not a Stark movie, the heist in Jimmy The Kid, Child Heist, it’s a ransom, it doesn’t fit the formula, Parker as a kidnapper, you want to steal something that can move and talk?, the efficiency, when Parker is doing something, going against my better judgement, nobody gets whacked in Dortmunder, bad luck, the rainstorm in Bank Shot, the rain washed the paint away, made the search less active, the captain of the police, funny names in there, one of them is named Block, guys he plays poker with, a book with Brian Garfield, doing cameos, pot-bellied, when the book came out, some diet stuff in there, the doctor character, the backer, Kelp, no matter what he said, “that’s a shame”, it’s money in the bank, we got a good shot on this one, he left the keys in it, you stole the man’s car and turned around and asked him for money, an AMC Javelin, we’re supposed to think it’s the same car, he only drives doctor’s cars, the doctor did fine, it’s double, I’m not in the right business for some things, Help I’m Being Held Prisoner, Ed McBain, Money For Nothing, you have been activated, many years he’s been receiving cheques in the mail, a sleeper agent, Downtown by Ed McBain, as one should, a lot of bad stuff was going on at that time, because of Yoda, the little green guy?, backwards you are, The Empire Strikes Back, stay with me, helping your friends is a mistake, alone in my cult, unfinished, a serial, the first one is done, saves the galaxy, wins the heart of the space princess, the respect of the scoundrel, you did not avenge your father, physically embodied as a ghost, Joseph Wambaugh, his 87th Precinct books, came out of Manhunt, like Westlake and Block, changed his name, went to Hunter College in Evanston Illinois, a more marketable name, a less ethnic name, police procedural, writing what you know and getting the facts wrong, flipped Manhattan on it’s side, when you get the facts wrong, he’s not a cop, he’s a writer, the mugger, the killer, Hill Street Blues, NYPD Blue, with more consistent characters, a rapist in town, getting there in a circuitous route, On the Sidewalk Bleeding, has to suppress, he’s read the guys, An Occurrence At Owl Creek Bridge, what good wiring looks like, the intersection, from the 50s until the 60s, it wasn’t a detective magazine, it was a crime magazine, series in there, the characters won’t survive the story, only some of them, like a writing school, getting good stuff out there, a pastiche, I Bludgeoned My Brother To Death Over A Sex-Doll, Whatever Lola Wants, Switchblade Magazine, a heinous crime for the best of reasons, the writer not being a cop, he was a cop, The New Centurions, The Glitter Dome, the movie, there is/was an audiobook of it, Trent Reynolds’ review of Downtown, kinda cool, there are other good writers to find, running out of Westlake, other writers to read, in the mood for a really good book, reliable, painting that room, putting that carwash together, China Mieville’s The City And The City, a dimensional portal fantasy, the aspect that it has in it, occupy the same territory, agree to ignore the other one, The Doomed City by Arkady and Boris Strugatsky, randomocracized every year, the librarian is now a janitor, shake things up, when the revolution comes, brushin the streets like the last emperor of China, what are we really talking about here, they’re in hell, not a torture hell, purely psychological, learned, the people from one city have a psychological blindness, not hit each other, consciously repress the knowledge of the other, on screen, really good science fiction on screen, what planet we visit next week, an adaptation, do the same job, film is very different, the latest Parker movie, based on the trailer, they just mention going to a casino off of Cuba, a mishmash of several stories, bits an pieces of seven different scores, City Of Industry (1997), a good scene in it, the end of some book he laughs, he is able to have some kind of human connection, a sexy blonde on a beach, on archive.org, slash fiction, Parker/Grofield gay slash fiction, he’s just saying you’re a part of the team, I find you sexy, handled in this book, I’m not sure if I need a man or a woman tonight, things get stressful, men are too difficult, that fun of Westlake is why, suppressing the humour, the jokes are muted, looking for new authors, Jason Pargin series, John Dies At the End, David Wong, listen to the sample, strong and prevalent, comes across almost immediately, very strong voice, several in a row is too much, we’ve booked The Handle for the 11th of April, knock off a casino, there’s a boat in that one, has to travel 3 or 4 states south, regulation number of lights on it, an experience, this guy is not writing out of his ass, rent a truck, gotta get some insurance, it’s fuckin red herring, right along with it, three sixes, suddenly the whole van’s moving, Merch’s mom, hearts, shoot the moon, she is shooting the moon, get the lowest number of hearts, 13 points for the queen of spades, the low score wins, you get everything, poker I do, both doing it in the same place, him having fun, what the hell is happening, decorated the place up, in the other room blasting, it’s pure comedy, they didn’t really fuck it up, the magic of the book, the magic of the writer, a movie improve on a book, I don’t need a movie version of Parker, or a slash fiction version of Parker, they would go together wouldn’t they?

Posted by Jesse Willis

The SFFaudio Podcast #885 – READALONG: Destiny Doll by Clifford D. Simak

Jesse and Scott talk about Destiny Doll by Clifford D. Simak

Talked about on today’s show:
a prediction, cut you off, “liked” and somewhat similar to “Special Deliverance”, Shaun D. Standfast people, stopping watching, second read, liked it even more, about a year ago, felt familiar, much more into it, one of his better ones, it’s great, some theories, what’s going on, Way Station and City, casual search through twitter, new audiobook, this is my favourite novel, that’s really odd, I like it too, even if we made a list of all the Simak writings, the top slot, really?, what is the phenomena, objectively, not particularly cohesive in terms of being an original sort of thing, Philip K. Dick, short stories vs. novels, designed to be a thing, aim at a target, which is the best Philip K. Dick novel, Evan Lampe, psychedelic feeling novels, Galactic Pot-Healer, fairly similar to this, Tin Men and Cowardly Lions, another Oz book, really spoke to people who read them at a certain age, you can’t disabuse people that those books are bad, why you can love this book, Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep?, the message is more of a question, what is our relationship to the artifical rather than the real?, it’s a what if?, what if America was occupied by the Japanese, mind expanding ideas, work and meaning, this is about art, your relationship to higher meaning, there’s a god, restoring the sunken cathedral, it has everything, what is it about?, I have no idea, it’s great, a starship captain, rich big game huntress, mixing of fantasy and science fiction, hobby horses, very Ozish, talking toys, don’t you say they’re robots, Star Trekish, triggered captain Kirk in me, finally found Lawrence Knight, fawning over the guy, the “tomb world”, not the person but the skull behind their face, steppin through doorways, what makes Simak so special, didn’t discover him earlier, almost no exception, he has this quality, more things in the universe than we understand, an unorganized religion person, there is a God, mythical layer, keeps appearing, appreciate it a lot, a line in here, the doll itself, Friar Tuck, like this book for some people, near the end, the captain guy, the only one left, back in the city and just thinking, philosophical thinking, they built this city, there’s something even older here, they built stuff, the carven plains of that saddened face of the doll, another race, the church-like edifice at the city’s age, the carving of the doll, the planting of the trees, that’s beautiful, this item, this art, a greater feat than all these buildings, calling out to the darkness, speak to you, old fantasies, Lord Dunsany and older, this quality, a quest novel, on a trek, a mythical quality that simak brings to the discovery, Rendezvous With Rama, a much more sterile book, an awe there, a mythical depth, it has that, they’re looking at the city, landscapes, who did this?, an emotion in here, touching something that’s transcendent, thinking for pages, he’s alone, amazing the thought that he has, pushed along by destiny, throw some facts down, kinda serialized, in one issue of Worlds Of Fantasy, Spring 1971, a note explaining it, a piece of an interview, 1978, 1971, Simak himself, the problem with Destiny Doll, a companion magazine, Worlds Of Fantasy, condense Reality Doll, cut it half and ruined it, what had had to be done, nominated for a Nebula, Destiny Doll was never nominated, interesting note, strictly for money, Westerns, spent the weekend reading them, cowboys as heroes, other people out west, I had things to say, 1949, this genre he’s writing, 5 fingers on it, Shakespeare’s Planet, whatever qua means, guy, girl, robot, weird monster, alien planet, no plot, roll the dial back, The Fisherman, plot driven telepathy, magic is real, the tin, man the cowardly lion, the scarecrow, an alternate dimension, they stop at an inn, they meet some creatures, some possibility of danger, quickly dispensed with, Simak is against conflict, where’s the conflict, the neighbours are a bit worried, spying on him occasionally, gets out the laser gun, centaurs, thousands will die, dude chill, the superior version according to Simak, unless included in anthologies, huge difference, one would presume, Lester Del Rey’s title, turns toward the Philip K. Dick aspect, shifting realities, Small Town, making changes to reality, outside the borders of his yard, the little model of it, takes out the bars and puts in libraries, look at this objectively, meet the characters, the blind guy and Friar Tuck, hobby horses run up to them, let’s go, suspicious, they go elsewhere, customs inspection, some gnomes, chapter 2 is the backstory, our Han Solo style roguish, back to our planet, that’s the whole book, adventures continue, they never leave back to go to earth, similar scenes, Cemetery World, the building are all white, robots, telepathic rhyming robot, what is this if not, the Final Frontier, checkbox, Shakespeare is in here, maybe she has a tattoo, check, religious elements?, check, strange planet, check, a place people go to and don’t return from, they’re all dead, Humans leave earth, dog starts to arise, The Faithful, religious elements, revisits, refines, The Visitors, Project Pope era, this is Simak, a lot of writers don’t have that, this is a Clarke novel, the perversity, got to put his perversions in there, you didn’t know I was a nudist?, let me drop some nudism in there, theses, at some point in every novel that’s a good novel the novelist reviews his own novel in the text, chapter 3, chapter 23, chapter 24, the DAW paperback, not synchronicity it is special attention, near the end of Chapter 3, the dune was no longer there, in it’s stead was silence, an insane crying, my friend is back again, super mysterious, the whole purpose in their journey, a venus fly trap, a honey trap, ships that come to this planet do not leave, is this God?, is this the sweet call of death, unusual for a Simak character, aggressive and yelly, shut-up!, that silly sickening look of ecstasy painted on his face, a creature from out of the desert world, that night that had lain over the white world, blocked out, no sign of the hobbies, earlier in the chapter, all good stuff, reading text, near the end of chapter 23, page 177, wispy filaments, wind whispered overhead, campfire smoke, something was chuckling softly to itself (that’s Simak), Shakespeare?, had it been Shakespeare?, how had Roscoe known of Shakespeare?, carried his knapsack, Shakespeare is a book, actual Shakespeare you have to read the actual Shakespeare, writing with an outstretched finger, also Simak, here’s the review: blue and high, stars ahead, and blue, blue laughter, think unhard, slowly I picked the words apart, blue foreverness, runners after nothingness, talk is nothingness, nowhere comes the answer, it was gibberish, worse than gibberish, the gibberish went on, page 52, far is distant, neither short nor long but deep, no stick to measure with, purple leads to nowhere, there is nowhere to lead to, to prevent the pages getting out, strange enchantment, Midsummer’s Night’s Dream, even if she knew, page 181, near the bottom, totally unintelligible, an utter moron, why my thesis is so true, laughing at himself, seemed to make some sense, blue and purple knowledge, all spectra of knowing, lonely planets, far lost in space, in the blue of time, trapped it is, a time of golden harvest, another tomb world, great orchards of mighty trees, down at the city, up at the city, the whiteness of the sky, the whiteness of the ships, as other planets soak in the golden sun, seeds trapped with knowledge, fruit is many things, sustenance for the body and the brain, it ripens and it falls, nonsensical rambling, thinking about his own thing, you can’t have that it the short story, a short story is like a device, like a pencil sharpener, it can be elegantly put together but it is not a dress, … a novel is like a wedding dress, why their stories suck, why does this guy have 6 brothers, the best stories, 1 character is enough, 2 is more than enough, in order to write a Simak novel you have to have a bunch of character, squid alien, Hoot, seems like a threat, immediately not a threat, are we not friends?, I sucked the poison out of you, what is he doing on this planet, we needed a cowardly lion, the man behind the curtain in the end is always Simak, let’s go, another Oz adventure, a formula that works, sit around a campfire, gets angry, calms down, a group on the road somewhere, one guy and a mystery, The Canterbury Tales, very similar to a lot of Simak, people on a pilgrimage, progress down the road, it’s ancient, told 1st person, and yet, when people disappear they disappear from him, lots of quest books, Nebula Grand Master, one of the fist ones, audio at an awards, dentures, 1977, a Stoker Award, Fritz Leiber, Frank Belknap Long, 1987, died in 1988, The Grotto Of The Dancing Deer, Hugo, Nebula and Locus, an early start date, before everybody, Murray Leinster, first short story, The Cubes of Ganymede, Campbell rejected it, many such cases, The Cosmic Engineers, Empire, a LibriVox version, not terrific, Project Mastadon, Mastadonia as the novel, Grotto Of The Dancing Deer and The Big Front Yard, when doing multiple stories, contrasting authors, H.G. Wells vs. Robert E. Howard, Conan vs. Conan Doyle, The Adventure Of The Cardboard Box, the one story that’s more interesting, they both have merit, having contrasting food, some real salty fish, some sorbet, completely, sherbet, sorbet, playing with ai (Gemini), notebook LM, 9 Simak interviews, ask questions, source documents, to make a podcast, one of the options, what it is useful for, a learning tool, make me a podcast and focus on his religious views, the NPR people, more interesting than good, people learn that way, ancient Greece, some aspect of ancient Greece, food in ancient Greece, educational mentors, BC Civil Liberties guy, [John Dixon] advisor to Minister of Justice, promoted to Prime Minister, politicians are good at shaking hands, they’re not geniuses, getting elected, they need smart people who know how to understand the world, all of them have them, dumb people as their advisors, he was not dumb, thoughtful, good taste in movies, write up something, write up a paper advising, busy gladhanding, what should be done, what should your policy position be, they’re not people, solve a bank problem for me, they’re untrustworthy, you don’t know who they are, a super racist Robert E. Howard story The Last White Man, a race war story, collaborated with the Asians somehow, one last man on the hill, as a man in a racist world, go max on Irishness, they say great things about it, there’s no sense of how stupid it is or how funny it is, no personal reaction to it, all the worlds associated with religion, a large language model, grey NPC character, that’s true of these products, which is Clifford Simak’s best novel, it really spoke to me, not what the tool is for, is Simak a religious person, testing this tool, list things that he talked about, here’s where you find that, a position paper, people are doing that right now, use data in some way, this group rated, Goodreads, pointing to the Shaun Standfast show, every book on Goodreads is 3.6, no one has read, the finest book I’ve ever read, modern stuff, it’s a thing, picking 4s, 4.5, gamified, to read a 3.5 would be absolutely not, movies and tv shows that are new, bots, work on the show, the corporation itself, there can be a rerelease, the same on utube, likes subscribers, in the end, I like to read Simak, he seems to reward me, I believe it, John W. Campbell, overrated, shit on him right now, good at coming up with ideas, go with Simak, go with Donald Westlake, part of their equations, the only other time, a journalist, a newspaperman, many such cases, strictly for money, pumpin em out, sounds familiar, feature length, super well produced documentary, Linotype, the business of paper and ink, answers so many weird questions, tears books apart, little marks beneath the page, an artifact, publish coordination mark, very kind of key, trays, electrical, you type a letter, a tray full of dies, negative dies, every line of the column, page 83, one column across, all a magazine styles with two columns across, this is the amazing thing, the letter that got inked were made of lead, the letter as you need them, every size every comma, that makes a slug, lead castings, same lead bucket they came from, like a printer that prints one line at a time, astounding, incredibly complex, the kinda training that nobody else will ever get again, just happened to come at the tail end of it, no demand for it, xeroxing, this is what made newspapers possible after the time of Benjamin Franklin, changed the world of knowledge and knowledge production than anything else, the machine the size of your kitchen, it’s big and you sit at it, hot lead spurtin out of it, Pay For The Printer by Philip K. Dick, a being from another planet, it copies the cup, very tired, the colour is faded, for making newspapers, every newspaper had one of these, technical people, superinteresting, people who run trains, not this job, bigger, every city that had a newspaper, every book publisher, guys, Mr. Pulpcovers, how well produced, I watched the whole thing, nice to learn things, thank you, a happy new year and merry xmas and a bruiseless boxing day, go Cowboys, which team is kicking the ball better, some kicking, throwing, running, some carrying, can you make a novel out of it?, some deeper purpose, too fun, cheerleader with a tattoo on her breast, collected fiction, spread out his best stories, sell em all, kindle, audio.

Posted by Jesse Willis

The SFFaudio Podcast #880 – READALONG: Cemetery World by Clifford D. Simak

Jesse, Scott Danielson, and Cora Buhlert talk about Cemetery World by Clifford D. Simak

Talked about on today’s show:
serialized November 1972 – January 1973, over three issues, almost everything by him, a Simak kick, Shaun Standfast has been ill, six months on pause, meet him in the cemetery and talk to him about it from above his grave, books in tweets, a disappointment, we didn’t read the same book, 22, old people books, Way Station, there’s no conflict in here, very brief, to spite Jesse’s theory, mad at the captain, annoyed, visit the boss who runs Earth, they don’t really do anything about it, wolves, two giant tanks, a bomb thrown, I’m mad at these ghosts, one of his road trip books, A Choice Of Gods, Goblin Reservation, shouted out in this book, End Of Nothing, Project Pope, he had that in mind, set in the same universe, a planet called Prairie, every book is the same: Wizard Of Oz, also in Astounding, Fishhook was the big bad organization, The Fisherman, Time Is The Simplest Thing, all of these are science fiction, random time travel by ghost, robot wolves, other things, witches flying on brooms, doing massive hard SF explanations, yet it contains a lot, telepathy, the whole idea that earth is turned into a cemetery, return to earth to be buried, not that far fetched, immigrants, Turkish passport to be buried in Turkey, return to the Earth, Germany used to be a lot bigger, conscious memories, trade in homeland soil, Transylvania, how the ghosts work, who is the census-taker, what is the census-taker?, a lurker, a hider, a scurrier, collecting things, anachronic, Marvel’s Watcher, an alien, the reader in Marvel comics, looking at the comics, a famous potter, a masterpiece, made for some great man of the time, perhaps for the census taker, 1963, predates, offer a thesis, City, Census, meditates on it, a thinker, very thoughtful, not fully cooked, he’s an immortal, a time traveler, he wouldn’t know us yet, the method of time travel, ghosts can do it, until a technology is invented, it always existed, why that would annoy somebody, you have to have come to this place now, what the future is like, unsatisfying also completely satisfying, what happens in the book is random walk, when he started this book, just fine as usual, is this guy Lazarus?, his feet are floating, he doesn’t eat very much or very often, if he is a biblical character, a hidden Christianity inside this book, never overt, Simak exploration, a list of Catholic authors, not a practicing Christian, thinking about it, a projection, shades, giant temple museum, the vase they found in the house earlier, the guy behind the desk is a ghost, a ghost into a body of a robot through technology, very Simak, uninterested in anything except the journey, travel to another planet, unicorns are real, just to have those experiences, three wolves, robot hero, Elmer, after a certain point, great robots, lawnmower robot named Clifford, of all the many 1930s stories, a lawmowerbot, annoys the protagonist, 1944, unable to predict the outcome of WWII, in hibernation, a little bit of this in it, Over The River And Through The Woods, a great short story writers, fix-up, a journey across country, a magical portal, so many good ones, parents find out a nuclear war is coming, the missiles are on their way, grandma and grandpa, time travel to the past, its got that pastoral loveliness, the conflict while present theoretically, The Black Hound Of Death and an H.G. Wells story, breaking bone, blood and gore, horrible and awesome, if Simak did that story, I’m not the worst guy, throw a bomb later, a really friendly dog, Robert E. Howard lied dogs, he liked them to be fierce, Simak’s ideal dog, a golden retriever, about the same age, what would happen, mostly westerns, the Sword and Sorcery revival, still be publishing, a writing machine, the gentle pastoral community, what is this book?, qualities you love, a marker of him, doing science fiction but not leaving behind the fantastical, stranger things in heaven and earth, quoting Shakespeare, Shakespeare’s Planet, a kindness that permeates, Bradbury loves the small town, walking overland, going down to the river, the other monster that’s in here, the ghouls, dig up graves, to get the metal, treasure boxes, not Lovecraftian ghouls, the corruption that is in the corporation, the corruption in the graveyard, the earth is a giant cemetery, a particular direction, Dune, desert planet, mostly just Arrakis, Tattooine, Hoth, jungle planet, Endor, Naboo, redwoodplanet, Philip Jose Farmer book, grass planet, Trantor, a cemetery world, a necropolis, rows and monuments but no occupants, I like alliteration, evocative stuff just within it, what people were like, girls and boys on dates would go for walks in the cemetery, the girl needs to snuggle up close, let’s think about death, I’d like to spend some time with you before we die, meet cute, an artist?, ai art, how prescient, ai assistant, a composition, the human needs to be part of it, people who are dismissive of ai art as slop, talking with Eric S. Rabkin, a little bit coughy, you passed the test, it was ai, fuck off, don’t send me your robot poetry, no soul there, youtube channels, human beings who really like Star Trek, make little skits with those actors with those voice, a little back and forth and around, the writing is not written by ai, the compositor, face swap, do impersonations better, wild crazy things, immediately infuriated, obvious to anybody, one of the themes in this book, given enough time robots are more human than human, care about art, I was born on earth, put together on earth, new Frankenstein (2025) movie, why did he make these changes, at the bed, we’re not supposed to like our Frankenstein creator character, that idea of a created thing creating new things, he was the guy who build one of the tanks, Joe and Ivan, waiting for Ivan to show up, Russia, peace prize to NATO, he’s doing great work in this book, in the right mode, very meditative, everything will be humane, the two headed corpse, a little horror show, travelling across a planet, some place, the girl starts turning into a mummy, in the basement there’s a fishtank viewer sort of thing, a general, a robot, a hero guy, and a girl, go through a portal and all of these things happen, the ai essay writer, A Choice Of Gods, same year, 1972, that could be any book, Special Deliverance, 1982, The Visitors, the same thing every time, a college professor, a giant blue cube, a role playing game scenario, a tavern, where are we, let’s go for a walk, something in the woods, everything that happens doesn’t happen with an overarching plot in mind written by the author, writing by the seat of your pants, humanness, coziness, a spritely love of life and existence, the first issue of Analog, the scene with the two tanks facing each other, two war machines, it’s symbolic, so powerful, two tiny little humans, a male and a female, don’t run away, you tell it much better than I, keep going, we can help you, the first human that’s ever listened to them, the people who live on earth today, 10,000 years after WWIII, very very American view of immigration, destroyed and irradiated earth, the adventurous ones, the younger sons, they already got theirs jack, women looking for husbands, the bars at the harbour, hung out with the sailors, had to go to the USA, hop a ship to go to America, undercut in the book, his visit with the drinking, the guys who run the squaredance, not much mutated, homey old fashioned moonshine, who wants to dwell on that, corruption throughout these organizations, a theme, teleprojection, astral projection machines, using that technology in a corrupt way, coherently plotted, in terms of structure, godly related, Christianly related, a mess, superstition coming back, the evil corporation, the nasty behind all the events that happen, rightly skeptical, dancin and sharin alcohol, we’re nice people, a bomb-throwing, this other corrupting thing making us do this, reading Simak over time, all the reasons for being cynical but chooses not to go that direction, city government in the first City story, see it more and more, over and over, corrupt organizations, prevailing against, Simak isn’t cynical, he was a newspaperman, this makes you cynical, engaged with what’s going on everyday, talk to the cop, the real dope, you can’t write that, you know what’s going on, get cynical real fast, drinking, not my problem, cashing my paycheck, a method somehow to exist and not lose hope, I go for a walk with my girl and my dog, enjoy the seasons, enjoy the river, the Ohio River, rivers are important, still there and still flowing, a symbol for time, and eternity, recurring themes, war, nuclear bombs became obsolete, no center to hit, survived, these war machines arriving at the scene and not having anything to do because it was over, meeting each other and becoming friends, being standoffish, fascinating, the same message, thoughtful consideration, black stones come down and eat trees, thoughtfulness, Cynthia, our girl, Fletcher, somebody put up a youtube video of Chapter 18 of this book, an interesting scene, flashforward into the past, the house, the pots and pans, vomits, a love story, facing death and horror, what will happen?, will you love me?, the build up for the whole book, he wants to dance with her, she looks pretty, of course I’ll love you, the only female character in the book, the same everytime, in Shakespeare’s Planet, a tattoo on her breast, sometimes women have tattoos and they need love too, what a guy this Simak guy, dead since the late 80s, a guy is still alive, witnessing his thought, what kinda artist is this Fletcher, his compositor is a typewriter, a mobile typewriter with six legs named Bronco, back in time to Alden, both from Alden, not an Iain M. Banks style galaxy, laze about, swapping genders, commerce going on, being skinned, another Simak book hidden within this book, exploiting people for money, gets a tip about a funeral home, you need that really expensive coffin, you could become cynical because there’s profit to be made, deaths cost went up significantly, buy up the grave again, 3000 euros, extorting you, trash the grave, grandma and grandpa’s bones on the trash, scatter ashes, violates the dignity, special rules for the corporations, mandatory like death, the background for Cemetery, the cemetery is full of corruption, get it, a robot clipping lawns beside a headstone, the image from the captain, unload, unloading coffins, build the coffins on other planets, a wooden coffin, bursts out Elmer, doing the Frankenstein thing, stronger than a man, bigger than a man, you’re going to ride me, the most accurate cover, the original serialized Analog cover, the tank in the background, the moon telling us where we are, walking with Edgar Allan Poe through the graveyard, the beauty that is lost, a great book, in the experience, a great walk in the autumn, loves retriveing sticks, you’re not allowed to drink it, a perfect book for this time of year, the prefect November book, A Night In The Lonesome October by Roger Zelazny, there’s nothing forced, ghosts are in graveyards, he’s not doing an homage, journey through the woods, to these great living monuments of death, a german edition, loved cemeteries, stroller through the cemetery, and churches, old graveyard, headstones, nice old cemetery, immigrants, former Yugoslavia, a liberal cemetery, bury me in a traditional conservative cemetery, disco lights, only grey headstones, only red granite, biological grandmother, step-grandmother, super regimented cemetery, praying hands by Albrecht Durer, bathroom wall, violated some kind of cemetery rule, Cora wanted to be buried at sea, interesting graves, poetry of the dead people engraved in the stone, a cargo ship engraved, a captain, graves with chinese letters, old ones, big tombs, locally famous people, in the graveyard, what percentage of these Simak novels have you read?, plenty, 27 novels, Comsimc Engineers, Empire, Ring Around The Sun, Time Is The Simplest Thing, They Walked Like Men, All Flesh Is Grass, Why Call Them Back From Heaven, The Werewolf Reservation, Out Of Their Minds, Destiny Doll, A Choice Of Gods, Our Children’s Children, Enchanted Pilgrimage, Shakespeare’s Planet, weird introduction to science fiction, A Heritage Of Stars, Mastadonia, The Fellowship Of The Talisman, The Visitors, Project Pope, Where Evil Dwells, Highway Of Eternity, read 11, newspaperman, heroic newspaperman, smoking is pipe and smiling, the covers are getting shittier and shittier, new ebook editions, 7 volumes of short stories, to read things back to back, the highlights, what makes them big?, recurring themes, one a month, as you see him develop, some authors shy away from doing that, Stephen King, you can’t help it, any good story is really about the author’s experience, stories set in ancient greece, ancient middle east, they read 1,001 Nights, in those experience they got a reverence for this, Clarke Ashton Smith story, wrote that story twice, never been out of California, east asia, jungly, desserty, elephants are awesome, abused circus elephants, Coney Island, tried to hang an elephant, big media stories, a circus that came to town, blown away by the size and the grace and the weirdness of that thing, The Tower Of The Elphant, what do these three guys have in common, sword and sorcery inventor, all about necromancers, that was their fantasy, they are writing in a tradition, the Thief Of Baghdad, Ali Baba, it allows you to create your own, the decline in Arabian fantasies, you really have read good stuff, fell out of fashion, they’ll tell you it’s racist, sexist, read the old good stuff, a book from 2008, terrible old books, 1968, they usually weren’t good books, teaching children Goethe, german rapper, Shakespeare, figuring out what that is, everything old is bad, everything new is good, colonialist, middle eastern set stories, H. Rider Haggard, stories about the crusades, the little triggers, take that little piece out, all those smoothing stones, the episode of Star Trek called The Apple, snake temple, another hippie in space, zap the temple with the phasers to kill the snake, these people are stuck, not be guided by the snake, it couldn’t be made today, too simple and good, let’s have a heist, fuck off I don’t want to see your heist, the last heist you needed to ever watch was Ronin (1998), for the fun chase, what’s in the box, we need never have a heist ever again, wait 1000 years, a gang of criminals have stolen a priceless artifact, stole a crown or something, plaguing Berlin, there’s no George Clooney here, any great art should be replicable, here’s a movie for Scott and Julie with no singing and dancing, Kill (2023), commuter on there, thugee style criminals, conflict between two families, clubs and knives, thieves, at the 40 minute mark, a blood splash, commandos from the Indian Army, the ice train movie, Snowpiercer (2013), a linear journey, Steven Seagal, Under Siege 2 (1995), every Marvel movie ends in a train fight, when is this singing and dancing going to end, some crown in the Louvre, melt down that crown, ketchup or mustard, air cover, the words themselves, the text within, font size, the kind of font it is, Simak lives in this book, he’s still alive, giving life to his ghosts, this is great art, barely doing what it says on the tin, mature works from a thoughtful guy, four days of prep time for Christmas eve, a Saturday, a liberal Christmas market, the costs were too high, 2026 is coming, month away, when did that happen?, time is the simplest quick thing, shopping in December, getting into Bremen, days to look forward to, ruminate on short stories, church stuff on Mondays, read it with your bare hands, illustrations, George MacDonald omnibus, 1858, Lilith, super-sick on that one, novella length, grokipedia, a rival for wikipedia, a bias towards evil, look at a president, CIA guys are allowed to make edits, the Phantastes entry, quotes Cora Buhlert, hoovers up everything, what all the scrapers do, weird contradictions, they all do this, the Clifford Simak one, Wisconsin, a slightly more controversial figure, war in Ukraine, gatekeepers, no person involved, banned sources, approved sources, consistently wrong, Armenia, Azerbaijan, fairly useful, consult grok, as good and all the features, asking specific questions, are there any repair places nearby, a search engines, ai art sucks, ai music that’s incredible, take 50 cents song in a soulful 1960s style, just changing font, I like Garamond, you like Arial, that’s not art, harder than transferring font, in the next five years, a household telepresence robot, stocking shelves in stores with telepresence robots, this ai art thing is mostly garbage at this point, that’s normal, losing jobs, the sabot, buggy whip manufacturers, do you really want to say you can’t replace human jobs with robot jobs, why these jobs?, translators cost money, a selfish argument, a selfless argument, birth certificate translation, people with use chat gpt in their job, sexually harasser, automated car tower stuff, Florida California, both have Disneys, putting valets out of work, a word for a job that doesn’t exist, an assistant, whenever the parking is inconvenient, weird service jobs, bag boy, a grocery packing robot, confronted with technology, it has to be bigger, everything’s about me all the time, nice gas station attendant, artist is a great job, ususally it is some scam, Guillermo Del Toro, the terrible book covers, painted covers, vaguely photoshop, a trend that goes way before the ai, a decision by individuals, I’m in this for money, a guy who makes boutique cars, I love cars, he’s gonna sell it or the country crashes, there were editors who used to love science fiction, I’m not gonna read ai books, the spelling or the font, Booker and Pulitzer prizes, what the grokepedia and the wikipedia matters, does the Hugo make it better, he had 17 hairs on his chin, the human will triumph over the automated system, The Gods Themselves by Isaac Asimov, we like him giving a toast, David Gerrold, Poul Anderson, The Book Of Skulls, Dying Inside, Robert Silverberg, The Dispossessed, gentle and loving vs. rough, Vietnam, Pacific Northwest, Avatar (2009), anarchist communist moon to capitalist planet, The Left Hand Of Darkness, The Lathe Of Heaven, the saint of science fiction, Margaret Atwood also a saint (but not of science fiction), Octavia Butler, someone’s entrance into science fiction, bloody Star Wars (1977), against opposition, one of many, weird saint floating above it all, just annoying, Bloodchild, fandom, focused on the wrong things, Francis Stevens is great writer, Simak is a white man?, American?, I hate those!, Clarke will last a little longer, the sad truth is all media, stop focusing on the book, trick the book publishers into trying to sell some books, conglomerates, vertical integration, they’re the gutter, they don’t even make novelizations anymore, desperate writers, Alan Dean Foster, Kevin J. Anderson, Predator (1987), too young, login to Disney plus, Piers Anthony, novelization of Star Trek: Next Generation tv series, Encounter At Farpoint, Doctor Who novelizations, people running things are incredibly stupid, tie-in-novels for Murder, She Wrote, Star Trek Animated Series re-imagined, kinda Star Trek, almost looks right, unsettling, Data and Picard and Worf, casual friday, uses the actor’s voice, fairly there, far in the future, technically possible, new episode of actual Star Trek, Deanna Troi having a conversation with Barkley she never had, under the radar at the moment, new seasons of Star Trek, they don’t want the competition, the real problem, we have more clamping than freedom, all the Gaza holocaust videos were deleted, everything gets clamped down, old money extracting and extracting, preventing magazine shops from opening up, can’t afford to live, can’t afford to rent shops, business ideas, nail studios, donair shops, barber shops, exploit their family to work for cheap or free, immigrant businesses, ruining our city centers, the high rents are ruining our city centers, everybody needs to eat on occasion, very difficult to get lunch anywhere, lots of restaurants no longer open for lunch, donair over McDonalds, food made by humans not by robots, tourist trap restaurant, automatic kitchen, robot movies, robots in movies, I Am Mother (2019), the five kinds of sandwiches, doesn’t care about you as much as your mom does, you eat the sandwich, hopefully it was made with love, no flies fell in it, no staples got in your tuna sandwich, is that love?, no, hire someone, make you sandwiches, none of those are love, all the rest is various degrees of commercialism, he’s writing for himself, we can trust him, no problems selling his work in his late period, he’s very very good, it’s full of love, no ai filler, he has to put the girl on the table naked because he’s trying to get the cover, what this book is about, except for the german one, the first issue of Analog, what grok knows, Frank Frazetta, just give me the gist, runs off and draws himself and his wife and giant snake, more passion than love, still a kind of love, wowing, new full cast Harry Potter, Stephen Fry and Jim Dale, a tv series, would have loved it at 10 or 12, a nerdy shop, half the stuff is Harry Potter, sweepstakes, put a yoda on it, Too Much by Donald E. Westlake, a Tamil version, The Twin (1984), the American one from 1995, doesn’t have twins, this book is so fuckin awesome, light comedy, a bit of an asshole but you love him, jaw dropped to the floor, Westlake’s so good at it, that little hidden hobby horse, insurance, it bothers him, funny little guy, lovely talking to you.

Cemetery World by Clifford D. Simak

Posted by Jesse Willis

The SFFaudio Podcast #879 – READALONG: Two Much by Donald E. Westlake

The SFFaudio Podcast #879 – Jesse and Alex (PulpCovers) discuss Two Much by Donald E. Westlake

Talked about on today’s show:
1975, paperback fuzz, worth the squeeze?, Fawcett, 1st edition, illustrated painted cover, flocking applied, fuzzy bikinis, if you rub that off you’ll see them nude, they look nude except for the fuzz, lying on a pile of pink fuzz, if it goes down, a great gimmick cover, Brother’s Keepers, a cover that reveals something, that cutout was to show a demon, a reveal cover, a monk on the cover, a halo, his clothes change, an insight, V.C. Andrews covers, what Westlake you got in stock?, trends in paperbacks, out of fashion, all we have is trades, mass market paperbacks, tall format, paperback shelf, hearsay from the internet, fold them into a signature, fold the paper four times, why they’re that size, everything is just glued together, weird big paperbacks now, weird stuff that’s like that, the prices of televisions and phones, a boule, what are the expensive parts?, the big sheet of glass, mechanical things that matter a lot when making physical, such a great writer, surprised and surprised and surprised, a Tamil version as well?, all the movies are long, a remake of the movie not a remake of the book, the French movie, farther and farther away, very close, an expected ending, our guy being convicted of murdering his non-existent brother, he never existed, we’re his cellmate, he just walks off into the sunset with both fortunes, murdered two women, the guy was probably self-defense, witnesses a murder, that’s what happened, chapter 28, quite deep into the book, not a light comedy, almost Shakespearean, a French farce, a French movie, you never get the money at the end, and both girls, actual twins, half French half American, an excellent film, bilinguality, such a fucking great writer, the American version, 1995, Antonio Banderas, Melanie Griffith, Daryl Hannah, Danny Aiello, easier to cast not-twins, back to her ex-husband, the book is the best, it hits you way harder, in the end we know he’s a horrible human being, a scamp, cheating, a real sleazeball, somehow even darker, he kills her on the 747, down she goes, sues the airline, even more money, some dialogue is identical, super close, why they wanted to make this movie, that bathroom shuffle scene, better overall, the star, the French guy, French handsome, weird thinning hair, big nose, weird cartoonist guy, too attractive, a mystery, tax purposes, everybody’s scamming everybody, leverage all over everybody, the format matters a bit, he knows what he’s doing, Veronica by Donald Westlake, a farce with a twist, the character and what he’s done, Elizabeth and Elizabeth Kerning, to kern, about spacing between words on a page, an old pulp magazine, right and left justified, a little book thing, their money is in paper and publishing, “Art Dodge”, the artful dodger, one who kerns, Bart Dodge, Robert, spinning up these stories, Fire Island, a very gay island, back to New York, a secretary, they get back together, Volpinex, Vulpine is fox, ex is out, out-fox?, kung fu and karate, the lawyer for the family, this level, relevant earlier this week, conversation with somebody exploited by the Epstein people, Palm Beach, trynna be a singer, the handler, the recruiter, here’s the contract, this Campbell’s soup heir, you need to be his girlfriend, when again allowed to be the head of the Campbell’s soup company, a certain amount of money per month, not that much, have sex with him?, that’s up to you, living off shore on a yacht, a warrant out or something, that’s fine, this doesn’t seem right to me, Hollywood rapes, this is a real thing, at the part, one bathroom, two bedrooms, sex in the closet, the parents died in a piano accident, is this a cartoon?, was it a murder?, there’s no evidence, how does a piano fall on a car, it was New Year’s Eve, his card company, this girl who’s doing her doctoral thesis on comedy, he also has sex with her, the psychology, a deep dark scary story, with a few changes it becomes a light romantic comedy, the shooting scene, thrusts the gun upon him, by accident rather than plan, cloned Darryl Hannah, he murders her twice, it would wreck his career, such a scamp, the tone, the whiplash, cold blooded murder, he’s really a terrible person, willing to overlook it, he’s always been incredibly selfish, he learns his art again, writing up ideas for Christmas cards, you’ve got it too, get well soon card, an idea for a birthday card, your birthstone is hanging around my neck, what does it mean?, the Rime Of The Ancient Mariner, the albatross, millstone from the bible, paralleling everything, responsible for his own murder, quite a bit like Edgar Allan Poe, we hate him, he’s a killer, a mirror image, chirality, sinister – dexter, it all matches, The Cask Of Amontillado, medoc, jokes within the story, medicine, we never really understand why the murder is happening, you who know so well the nature of my soul, the last words of the story, RIP, he’s blessing the murder, relishing the telling, he got away with it, his priest, his confessor, gets to go to heaven, his soul has been cleansed, the legalistic way, if you’re an evil shit, keeps growing in estimation, William Wilson, this problem at the school, exactly my name, the opening of the story, for the present you may call me William Wilson, a doppelganger, in trouble, the mirror trick in book, getting ready for it, well done in the French movie, a swordfight with the other William Wilson, there was no other William Wilson, wakes up a couple of times, he’s drugging the women, the waiter’s getting mad at him, very lightly gone over, right to sleep, less obvious in the book, we forgive him all his sins, so likeable, these debts, $75-80?, he picked a target, what about twins?, twins dating twins, genetically identical, you’re brother’s children, your own children, their cousins are genetically siblings, adopt a pig and make it your child, to mother it, cat moms, pig moms, eat your babies, eat them at the right age, what if you’re a man, Twins, Basil! Twins!, save money on taxes, Two Much (1995), kinda blonde, 1 much, twinning characters together, four girls total?, his friends wife, a maid at the end, going on our honeymoon, you’re never coming back, everything’s working out, there’s the twist, the twist back, every possible variation on it and nailed it, walking across a crosswalk, laughing out loud, Westlake’s so funny, the phone scene, both ends of the conversation, not as well as Westlake does it in the book, so good with characters, the bartender, we have no rum, ha ha ha, ho ho ho, effortless storytelling, focus on hands, he makes a bridge with his hands, observing what they do with their hands, that little flourish of characterization and we’re there, the new family buying their place, horses and horse-racing, having him be a painter, art dodge, they’re all fuckn horrible, modern art in movies never works right, without royalty, modern art on film, like music, this would never be a hit song, the Michael Cain movie called The Hand (1981), it is a tragedy, crazy stupid little movie, it paid for my garage, Jaws IV, I’ve seen the house it bought my mother, greeting cards, sits with us like a stone, greeting card business, being able to come up with something to write inside of them, Jesse’s poor, register for wedding, blessed wedding, “you will always be each other’s greatest gift”, the other French farce, Cyrano de Bergerac, the handsome guy with no words, the Juliet balcony scene with Romeo tongue-tied, 1984, 2000s, this could be anytime, it could in the 1980s, nothing in it makes it dated, racist slurs in the greeting cards, anti-gay slurs, the race riot, at what point are we supposed to twig this guy is the villain, the way people drink, vodka, rye, a good liqor neat, rail vodka, how beards or hats go into fashion, maybe hats are coming back, time outside, a good chunk of your day, walking to work everyday, having to spend time outside, the number of convertibles has gone down, people doing their tick tock videos in their car, you live with your parents, an enclosed little vocal booth, a weird place to sit, with their phone, things have changed, very realistic, to get his own airplane company, because he’s rich, the heir to this massive, billionaires, calculate for inflation, Bart’s the good one, Art’s the evil one, sleeps with his brother’s wife, cuckold’s himself, Beth and Liz, one’s a bitch, the other’s nice, cuckolding him?, with twins it gets confusing, we’re worried about your brother inseminating your wife, it’s not about genes, red hair, wait a second, looks exactly like you, you can’t be upset, there’s some slippage, you can’t be jealous but you can, so far away you could almost not even notice, that’s from the French movie more, whoever made that Melanie Griffith movie, La Cage Aux Faux (1973), dozens of movies, Cops And Robbers, could this book have been better written by another author better?, The Devils’ Elixirs by E.T.A. Hoffmann, Westlake vs. Stark, The Comedy Is Finished, that turn, the killing, that evil that’s in there, reading Dortmunder, silly criminals, Westlake is more masterful than people can know, art books, tell fun stories, tackles a topic, two criticism, when the author mentions other books, Arthur Hailey, chonkers, Hotel, a novel, Airport, Robert A. Michner, James A. Michener, leaves the novel, you reader are reading a paperback, a shitty paperback, you’re carrying this right out, on the shelf, the good cover with the flocking, wet glue fuzz particles with an electrostatic charge, an arts and crafts thing, diorama of grassy knolls, health issues, flockworkers lung, Kahawa, Kenya train heist, Idi Amin, Raid On Entebbe, famous president of Uganda, eagerly take any Westlake novel, too late to be public domain, Killing Time, Brother And Sister, the reason you fucked it up, for that market, assigned that, my great incest novel, get it done this weekend, until the 70s, early 2000s, so solid, a show that’s never gonna come out, The Screaming Mimi by Fredric Brown, Knock 3 1 2, Virgin Planet by Poul Anderson, done in real time, a serial killer on the loose, Ray Fleck, compulsive gambler, the dame he’s shacked up with, the city boils over, hard-boiled, two-timer, cheater, crop and rotate, colour corrected, look fake, resource for the finding the originals, google is so shit, my plugin guy, the gallery plugin, now fixed, what was in the scan, artifact, cloned, filled but didnt do it with love, an H in the bottom right hand corner, John Newton Howitt, inflating the word count, School Mistress Of The Mad, College For Corpses, title generator, x of the y, defying the rules, a woman in distress (to put her on the cover), male fantasy, married already, sexually grateful, a fantasy for the reader, mad people, insane people, escaped lunatic, weird fiction in weird tales, late 19th century, cut-off somebody’s head, Mike the headless chicken, brain stem, made the body super strong, if it get you it will hug you to death, glands story, goat glands, W.C. Morrow, dip ladies in acid, gold, wax, mummies, to put them in jeopardy, so they can be rescued, The Painter Of Dead Women by Edna Worthley Underwood, Pygmalion in reverse, not quite the formula, saves herself, I need a mad scientist, just so long as she’s in mortal peril, perverted weird tales, the same period, the shudder pulps, depression era, survive WWII, paper shortages, write about paperbacks, heiresses, everything twinned, effortlessly, what a hero, two books that year, Lester Dent, two novels a month for a decade, what’s this book really about? twin, the title, numbered kids, Primus, Secundus, Tertius, Dos Muchos, internet archive.org, the dedication, who knows how, the mistress of Adam’s Apple, Eve, the snake, Abby Adams, he knows what he’s doing there, a quote, two heads are better than one, John Hayward, reviewing his own novel, the front half of a horse suit, was that supposed to be funny?, threw it away, you didn’t get what you thought you were getting, funny on the front, funny on the back, a lightweight farce, evil getting away with evil, he can’t be amused, becomes he becomes a real murderer, Lisa, you make fun of them, Westlake doing his philosophy, what’s going on with humor, standup comedians, bombing, killing, chatting her up, what comedy is and what it is for, practice murder, he’s murdering out there, not everything funny is about murder, defeating expectations, a baboon watching magic tricks, put a lid on the cup, the empty cup, a laughing sound, laughing behavior, we have a map of the world, when they don’t line up, it makes us laugh, somehow built into brains, hyenas laugh, the mirror, why we hate him, the outfoxer who must be physically destroyed, struggling over the gun, blackmail him, in the office, you’re just like me, ultimately, at what cost, its all profit, man this guy’s a good storyteller, an anti-twist, the conventions are so strong, the expected twist, the lack of twist is shocking, a twist and then a retwist, money, house, company, money in the mail, its like Elbe, Napoleon put on an island, what!?, he did it again, what an evil shit, sues the airline, the cherry on top, she died really tragically, yes sir right away sir, didn’t fuck over his secretary, severance and, little bit exposed, its okay, personable, some of the dad’s stuff, korsakoff’s syndrome, a commercial movie, people would hate it, fluff, the French version today, ends like the end of Dirty Rotten Scoundrels (1988), he just murdered that lady, she’s not nice, Betty you feel pretty bad about, happens quick, the heat of the moment, the best of a bad situation, twice is a pattern, conversation on twitter, character arcs vs. character revelation, what is Hamlet about?, my uncle murdered my dad, his dad told him, doesn’t believe ghosts, killing everybody including his mom by accident, better than brooding in your bedroom and killing yourself, some built in fatal flaw, no characters in Shakespeare grow they only reveal themselves, it works for Star Wars maybe? over the Hornblower series, he has less hair, more confident, he gets taller, riddled with self-doubt, Admiral Hornblower, talking about your D&D character, level up, character revelation, set your players, see where they go, whatever gears and programming inside of them revealed by the story, how could have we ended this better, cheating, lying to people, the stakes are a little higher, you kill the girl too, that bitch, she’s gonna inform on me, fuck her, this character’s horrible, great book though, Knock Three-One-Two by Fredric Brown, Phantasties by George Macdonald, the book that turned C.S. Lewis gay for Anglicanism?, a fairies romance for men and women, 1858, an ancient fairy lady in a desk, transforming into a forest, fairyland itself, Travels With A Donkey, donkey travel, witnesses dueling societies, officiates at a duel, the tone is mixed, jump off of the Matterhorn with an umbrella, Mark Twain is so reliable, more shudder pulp stories, how nuts they are, nice and short, good book.

Two Much by Donald E. Westlake

Posted by Jesse Willis

The SFFaudio Podcast #878 – AUDIOBOOK/READALONG: A Tramp Abroad by Mark Twain

The SFFaudio Podcast #878 – A Tramp Abroad by Mark Twain (15 hours 33 minutes) read by John Greenman for LibriVox, followed by a discussion. Participants in the discussion include Jesse, Scott Danielson and Cora Buhlert.

talked about on today’s show:
1880, western Europe?, France, Switzerland, mostly Germany, 6 travel books, the semi-official sequel, Innocents Abroad, 1869?, the answer is none, Paul [Weimer] and Trish [E. Matson] and David J. West, a really good book, tipped hand, the audiobook, washed over, some gaps, non-fiction, pick it up again wherever, not so much a cohesive story as a series of coorespondences, Travels With Charley by John Steinbeck, very first cruise ship, the start of modern tourism, 9 years later, in full swing, pilgrimage, requisite Grand Tour, 1878, Switzerland, the hotels, makes fun of the German language, difficult to learn, pitfalls, he’s Twain now, much more interesting, Baden Baden, from the South, exaggerations not lies, student swordfights, fraternity, young men, suspicious, still have swordfights, the swordfighting section, Otto Skorzeny, Hitler’s commando, non women at the time, all men, the elites, dueling scars, what killed off these fraternities, post-WWII education reform, people from different areas, left wing liberal, 1848, pro-limited democracy, conservative, 1960s-1980s, own events, steal the caps, a bounty for every cap stolen, much diminished, 2024, just boys being boys, 1933, epee, goggles, nose protection, went into the brain, old universities, student prisons, they still exist, German-Polish border, graffiti the students left behind, that scene is illustrated, smites, very proud of it, so you could see it, that’s why they’re doing it, showing off their manliness, Bismark in prison, writing on the wall, RACHE, means vengeance/revenge, A Study In Scarlet by Arthur Conan Doyle, a carving in blood or red paint, the police are baffled, Rachel, a red herring, Conan Doyle was an avid reader, where he’s stealing stuff from, stealing from Poe, how dare you compare me to C. August Dupin, very interested in foreign affairs, things outside of London, the KKK, the Mormons, A Scandal In Bohemia, guy from India, rip stories from the headlines, to Reichenbach Falls, Easter Germany, Czechoslovakia, Lichtenstein, Luxembourg, Belgium, the Netherlands, this specific, the Bond movie, On Her Majesty’s Secret Service (1969), George Lazenby, San Fransisco Chronicle, daily correspondence, people tuned into the newspaper everyday, what is this funny guy doing, very sequential, everything is incidents, a travelogue, a diary, bluejays for 3 chapters, whatever strikes him, local legends, the Lorelei, no nymph, no statue, the way the best understood, hilarious exaggerations, close studies, highly accurate, plays it for fun sometimes, an immensely close recreation, the next chapter he’s in France playing the second of a duel, the funniest thing you’ve ever read, the contrast between the two, a journalist, he’s playing it for comedy, choose your weapons, Gatling guns at 15 yards, attendees, apologize and hug each other, some grain of truth at the bottom, climbing Mount Blanc, all the things they bring, tobacco and beds, 138 umbrellas, mountaineering, reason to climb, outlaws fleeing the law, pay a yodeller, endlessly entertaining, stumbling around in his bedroom, a whole chapter, this is what people are paying to read, what’s so striking about it, through movies, he’s Hamburg, Germany gets its sense of identity by what Julius Caesar said about the Germans, this is us, only a united nation for 7 years, small kingdoms, dukedoms, so clean and so nice and so new, in about 2000 years, describe Switzerland to the Swiss, a foreigner coming in, everything that he writes in this book, unimpeachably true, a guy named Harris, in really fun and good American literature, Fear And Loathing In Las Vegas, a travel book, there’s no way to have that experience and be able to write about it, the aftermath of a party in a room, how it looks, what must have happened, these soap bars, journalists, cars haven’t been invented yet, the train, rafting, very Twain, a steamboat guy, Twain was a civil war officer for the South, they’re best friends, John Jakes’ North And South, anti-slavery, his unit disbanded promptly, went off to Nevada, San Fransisco, Travels by Michael Crichton, very different people, romp, tramp, a good genre, pilgrimage to Spain, the medieval pilgrimage, Anthony Bourdain’s show, quality of the narration, the street food, a vacation through the stomach, Michael Palin, Jeremy Clarkson, infamous, popular, what they have in common, the populace likes them, with airs about it, the finest restaurants, the kitchen, German coffee, chicory, a giant vat of boiling water, here’s your coffee sir, real coffee, fake coffee, malted grain, has to be imported, Heidelberg, the coffee ports, Bremen, they have to carry it by donkey, trains, a real guy, Goethe wrote a play about him, the iron hand, fight with an archbishop, he may lick my ass, this book in mind, a radio show, brief in the book, the Lion of Lucerne, carved into this cliff, this is something to see, there it is across the water, a wound in it, dying or dead, in memory of some event, to see it, a tourist destination, a kind of a secular version of pilgrimage, recreating Byron’s life, that book is inspiring, an activity, Antarctica, At The Mountains Of Madness, you hate cruises, literature, how powerful it is, there are countries created out of fantasy, Israel, Germany, the second German empire, what to include, why Austria is separate, the Prussian king, keep Austria out, weird south east European places, into modern Russia, minorities, a book set in Antarctica, Edgar Allan Poe, the act of imagination, William Dean Howells, A Traveler From Altruria, a commune, the secret is that books are incredibly powerful, I would like to go to Europe, Mark Twain’s A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court, Karl Mai, an early cosplayer, read for generation, hike the mountains, Kurdistan, why the obsession, why do you go to Baker Street?, a museum, destroyed in WWII, answers letters to Sherlock Holmes, humans are monkeys, monkey see monkey do, tictock dances, I wanna be a cowboy/astronaut, you’ve found your identity, Foundation by Isaac Asimov, archaeology, sociology, a chemist, Paul Krugman, Newt Gingrich, Osama Bin Laden, one of those books, it will wreck you at the right age, travel agencies and cruise operating, free copies of At The Mountains Of Madness, a few other things that are striking, the American who has the same conversation with everyone he meets, what ship did you come over on?, is this your sister?, that personality, you meet people like this, a character sketch, in the previous one, he went into a church, gave a blind woman a gold coin, steals it from her hand, that incident, visiting again, the Acropolis, broke in, climbing over fences, chasing after them, if you’re an animal, see food you eat it, read another of his books, so personable, so relatable, whatever he’s thinking, not crass, what was actually happening there, is this a prostitute?, very young girls, he doesn’t take advantage, Dorothy Quick is great, encouraged her to write, her friendship, they were friends, a really good incident, looking at a woman, how old is she?, are you 18, I’m so glad you came over, how is this person, what did you name him?, not admitting the truth at the beginning, delightful and breezy and easy, still tremendously enjoyable, laughed out loud several times, the essay on the German language, I attack them, so funny, convincing one of the guides to jump off the cliff with the umbrella, let someone else do it, a giant extended joke, how credulous can you be?, he is funny, an appendix on portiers, extinct by now, the American way, giving everybody tips, concierge, high end luxury hotels, the Ritz, Singapore, such a weird thing, still has these, New Orleans, Arthur Hailey’s Hotel, the courier, in chapter 32, courier du bois, the tradesman, this job has disappeared, find some natives, load up with furs, come back to the fort, how Canadian history works, eventual shipment to Europe for hats, not for furs, something else, chocolate coloured, still it was worth it to inquire, ask for the price, above all not to reveal, it’s a hundred francs too much, broken German, a pleasant surprise, please do not let your courier know that you’ve bought it, I do not have to pay you a percentage, 100 francs, twice or thrice, both get a percentage, getting ripped off, travel without a guide is completely horrible, the guides get lost, Philip K. Dick, the assumptions, pulling the rug out from under us, never a maliciousness, not even mean, what he’s doing, it works everytime, met the pope, there was a guide, exactly what to do, get close to the aisle, had bad seats, extremely helpful, knows all the rope, tour guides, a different name now, on the Neckar river, barge, travel within the United States, the air b&b route, a neighbourhood, living like the people who live there live, how to do the research?, people to meet, local guides, a seminar conference, looked up online, see this, see that, an uber, extremely easy, there was a book, Let’s Go Europe, Let’s Go Mexico, Ford Prefect, The Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy, gets a percentage, canny, a travel agent, cheap the whole way, the cheapest whatever, when the museum is free, largely replaced with online stuff, a paper map of the city, a painting in a museum, on the Rome trip, St. Peter’s, a guided thing, they hired somebody, a historian, spent the whole day there, get around, if you live in a place for a couple of weeks, vs. passing through, the ideal way of doing it, commenting on all sorts of different experiences, schoolboys fighting, get involved, white hats, how many boys fight per day, French honour, very present to whatever it presented to him, take him on a certain ride, disappointed by something, becomes very memorable, the squalor and poverty of the people, the animals, starving to death, very old, a hotel like that, it was a grand hotel, pay the full freight, it doesn’t come across as mean spirited, Edgar Allan Poe tried to start a magazine, she was rich, his hobby of a magazine, died right before the wedding, just wait, 15-20 years later, Mark Twain becomes wealthy because of the popularity of his books, being honest, a savage critic, he would scalp you, he would let you know, the guy who hated him Rufus Griswold, puffed everybody, no matter what you write you get puffed, this crypto-bro scheme of becoming writers, selling on Amazon, 20booksto50k, if you don’t play the game, to not offend anybody, completely non-offensive, the recipe for success, thoroughly entertain everybody, they thought it was bad, kept investing in things, what a great writer, his major stuff, Tom Sawyer, Huckleberry Finn, Joan Of Arc, a funny book for him to write, The Prince And The Pauper, Poe mostly wrote short stories and a lot of criticism, as a journalist, The Celebrated Jumping Frog of Calaveras County, Cannibalism In The Cars, senators eating each other, the sense of humour, the reverence for experience and life, why do you want to go on a trip to Europe?, experiencing these things, that is what he is seeking, that delight, just the pictures, half the men are smoking, weird old-fashioned pipes, something we pass over now, the same software, there’s no electricity, there’s no electric anything, impressed by the gaslight, what happened to the hotel, entranced, the discourse on Wagner, nobody likes Wagner, you get to like it, the longer the better, serialized chapters, comes at you in waves, go out and pick specific things?, wouldn’t you pay?, they stopped hiring Mark Twain, on tv sort of, Netflix, the personality of the deliverer, also dead, Herman Goutmann, a slightly different personality, an abrasive personality, a witticism for everything, Hermann Gutmann, Dave Barry, The Ultimate Melody by Arthur C. Clarke, every wedding, Lohengrin, pyromania, opera house, sweaty, Angela Merkel enjoyed it, sweatspots, stuffy, talk about Twain for a minute, never fell anything by him that fell flat, whatever he does is super-reliable, the guy you can always turn to, there is a Mark Twain I haven’t read, every book has worked, how he came to do it, very episodic, it’s not the coherence that matters, A True Story by Mark Twain, laughing on the front porch, servant/cook/maid, there is no funniness in it at all, making fun of the maid, she’s making fun of them, that man is alive in that text, a man who’s still with us, this is a living man, Shakespeare, very excited about maybe Shakespeare isn’t Shakespeare, as Borges points out, he’s thinking about how people are actors, players, wherever Mark Twain goes he’s right there, she’s illiterate, all he does is transcribe what she said, it’s not a fossil it’s alive, reading good books, kept comparing, what it looked like in the 19th century, German and American education system, very accurate, university is very specialized, listen to lectures, more school-like today, go in line with, somewhat like this, a lot of freedom, you could not attend a lecture, it’s different now, school-track school-system, gymnasium, academic track, very well educated, more than a U.S. high-school diploma, college in the U.S., the kind he describes, ancient Greek and Latin, 1970s brutalist school, still require Latin, take Latin at school, a year from now?, Following The Equator (More Tramps Abroad), The Gilded Age: A Tale of Today by Mark Twain and Charles Dudley Warner, a reason to keep reading, good book, learned a lot, reduced to Huckleberry Finn man, mean true things about the German language, more John Irving and Anne Tyler, if not the greatest, Westlake, sad story, Two Much next sunday, Simak the week after, Phantasties, Travels With A Donkey.

A Tramp Abroad by Mark Twain

Posted by Jesse Willis

The SFFaudio Podcast #873 – AUDIOBOOK/READALONG: Killing Time by Donald E. Westlake

The SFFaudio Podcast #873- Killing Time by Donald E. Westlake (4 hours 25 minutes) read by Ben Tucker for LibriVox, followed by a discussion of it. Participants in the discussion include Jesse, Scott Danielson, Maissa Bessada, and Misha Burnett

Talked about on today’s show:
1961 novel, the great Donald E. Westlake, different titles, the same book, The Mercenaries, tore this book up, a new Donald Westlake, a phase, found everything by him, many pseudonyms, a lot of books, the Parker novels, strongly recommended, Plunder Squad, Butcher’s Moon, so much more Westlake, something to live for, maybe 10 of them, science fiction shorts, Anarchaos, a handful, I love him, as you should, real hard at the end, poor Maissa, mostly, feels like Donald Westlake, about the ending, for real, pretend to talk about the book, the “spoiler” word, one of the most stupid words for understanding reality, can there be a sequel to this book with the main character, he’s dead?, any other ideas?, the rules of fiction, a first person narrative where he dies at the end, first person past tense, another interpretation, he shot Cathy, the last three paragraphs, the pile of lumber, the front stoop, only got 2 minutes left, calling my name, far far away, between us was Cassal, cradling a shotgun, you set this up, I had to, the sound I heard was Cathy screaming, he shot Cathy, that hurt him more than anything, both ways, a first person narrative, if he died, even cooler now, he’s good, he didn’t forget that, how this book works, pretty weird book, what this book is, Red Harvest from the insider’s perspective, a Dashiell Hammett novel, Bruce Willis, can’t talk anymore, Yojimbo (1961) by Akira Kurosawa, samurai, very famous western starring Clint Eastwood, A Fistful Of Dollars (1964), an unproductive screenplay adapting Red Harvest, the Op, the Continental Op, a series character, was a Pinkerton, very quiet these days, Blackwater, private military agency, Red Dead Redemption, terrific game, Grand Theft Horse, a podcaster, Pinkerton’s Ghosts, a paranormal investigation branch, Hearst, the HBO show Deadwood, the first Hearst, the way you get rich is not by finding gold but by finding people who found gold, corruption, legal corruption, a private police force, a private army, mercenaries, security guards, overthrowing a town, we don’t find that out right away, a super-political book, social commentary, the situation people are in, hobby horse ideas, he’s very non-office, a book about politics, different factions, politics today, political philosophy, pure power, causes, 2 parties, which one is trying to take over, confused, the why behind all of it, Tim, a sympathetic character, do anything to defend his life, justified and necessary, three quarters of the killing, a war, stretching, an allegory for other wars, pointless killing, my team, your team, that is his political position, reading it today, zoom out, one country getting in the middle, a proxy war, manipulating both, my own army now, now I can fight this war, making that climax occur, to destroy both of them, he’s kinda like Conan, how can I exploit this situation, for a fist full of dollars, a comedy, a ronin, a samurai without a master, he’s talking about things he knows, themes, secretly obsessed with insurance, me not notice, this book has insurance, tomato boxes, gets the girl to do it, to protect himself, hedge your bets, something to do with insurance, my guy Richard Stark, kinda shocking, the stage, excited about producing local theater, write plays?, a performer, like Grofield in the Parker novels, Westlake is making fun of himself, really I’m an actor, I need to rob this bank to make another season of summerstock, producing plays that nobody goes to, 2017, many years ago, the name of the play that was produced, Tim Smith, leaned over and looked at the script, read it upside down, on page 68, A Sound Of Distant Drums, if it was a hit, good luck, this is a game of tennis Donald Westlake played with Lawrence Block, a movie theater, thinking about something, deciding on something, a restaurant, a Pizza Hut, when he walks out of the movie theater, reading a paperback on a park bench, what fun, why is that in there, a little piece of colour, the whilhelm scream, very distinctive, the Tarzan yodel, a little checkbox, Westlake does that a lot, self-referential moments, the Dortmunder novels, Jimmy The Kid, Andrew Kelp is in jail and reads “Child Heist” by Richard Stark, reads snippets, this is how we do it, Adios Scheherazade, Point Blank in the movie theater, the worst (first) of the Parker novels, became himself, out for revenge, revenge is stupid, a character arc, we get this instead, she was screaming, listen, that last page, 221 pages, page 211, the plant was wrapped in flames, the neutral cops, crawl down backwards, way down the street, cradling, icy cold, you set this up, the sound I heard, who’s dead, shot by somebody else, shooting the last vestiges of himself, Tim shot Cathy, it doesn’t say that, the worst thing he could have done, he raised the shotgun, that’s not what it says, if we’re filming this, he points the shotgun at Tim, fade to black, but fade to black, choose your own ending, either way it works really well, the spinning top at the end of Inception, no matter how many Donald Westlake movies you think exist there’s always more, It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World (1963) sort of movies, half-way through it, Cops And Robbers (1973), 2 new adaptations, Memory (retitled The Actor), right after Westlake died, always new last books coming out, a Bob Hope style character, one of the Stark novels, or a Dortmunder novels, the Stark novels get pretty bizarre, Ask The Parrot, 1951 Ford, an interesting fact, Score in the title, The Green Eagle Score, an airforce base, Westlake was a cop, he was a “snowtop” white helmeted, Navy police, break up fights, a cop in Germany, he’s never really on their team, or they’re criminals, a bit surprising, a little tubby, a little flab on him, he’s rich, he doesn’t have to work for a living, the easy life, the anti-Raymond Chandler, not starving, they don’t make good cars anymore, he’s getting paid by everybody, he’s the badguy, listening to his arguments, the pot-holes are filled, useless turds who didn’t know how to run the town, the analogy, The Screwtape Letters by C.S. Lewis, the safest road to hell is gentle underfoot, the perfect rationalizer, he doesn’t think of himself as a bad guy, evil, him staying quiet, screwed out of his house, the tax shift, never willing to say I did something wrong, confess to a lawyer, confess to a priest, not my job, to do terrible things and say it was my job, as an example, AOC, she thinks she’s a good person, she ain’t she won’t talk about things that are true, the other team, stuff they won’t talk about, with Tim in the diner, why is he up so late eating that sandwich, difficulty sleeping, why won’t he marry her, the death of the family, what’s missing, he likes her well enough, deep down he’s not a good guy, he’s not thinking about her, Westlake never hits us with this, this guy’s trying to kill him, Somebody Owes Me Money, people getting knocked off, a light comedy with romance, the girl is involved with trying to kill him, gambling winnings, fun, his father is constantly trying to find a loophole, The Risk Profession, an insurance adjuster, roads and traffic, tiny little wee story, technically science fiction?, people driving around New York, a hyperrealized version of our reality, a parking lot, people sitting in their cars, they’re just in there, they live in there, sit behind the driver’s seat of the car and wait in a parking lot?, do they have a job they’re supposed to be at?, that’s what inspires Westlake, a story idea, the overturning of the government in this town is not a good idea, corrupt but works, a clue, it works for him, incompetent government is a real thing, switching to another team, this reformist group, one party to get it over on the other party, this association secretly backed, for his own power, a very very cynical book but doesn’t feel it until the end, floating along, it’s a whodunit, the bodyguard, maybe I’m misreading this book, one of the lines that repeats, one of my seven closest friends is trying to kill me, he can’t honestly say, depressing, gets arrested, national guard, definitely not him, we think of Cathy being close to him, does he love her?, you didn’t even bother to tell me, shot at the first time, I had a need to talk to somebody, unload, is that selfishness, Scott does a lot of stuff for me, I hope I’m not using, a trade?, some people keep score, helped you move three times, when your dog is sick, fetched that ball for you, I need that dog for that sled dogging race next week, gut punch, got nervous, why are we going to war?, you should leave town, the final time: I’m going to war, why?, selfishness, he is a bad guy, almost tries to stop, killing his friend, I’m just gonna stand here and watch and wait, pulls him back, conscience, his first impulse, willing to accept corruption as the price of soft roads, if you listen to the mafia, all the good works they do for their town, I keep the neighbourhoods clean, no racism element, an all black town, an all white town, very targetedly political, as they get older, at certain point they freeze politically, can’t be surprised by new things, Lawrence Block, very closed mouths about his poltics, his home, New York, Hollywood, Hills View?, random audiobook of a Donald Westlake short, The Girl Of My Dreams, upstate New York, Manhattan, when you move to a small town, a store over there, that guy is a veteran, the lady who collects cats, the high school, the cement was filled with sand, he’s a good guy, a story, a thing that happened, Las Vegas 30 years ago, his last day, retiring, when the mob was in charge of Las Vegas, some pickpocket, they just took care of it, nice for the tourists, my potholes are full, this incident a lot, a true story, a break-in, stolen comics, a burglary, not, that’s not a thing, I know how this system works, in this conversation, trying not to dispatch cops, investigate burglaries, a criminal gang, the Bacon brothers, what building they’re in, should I go an knock on this person’s door, ask them to do it?, this is how it works, if I can’t get justice from the official system, the unofficial system, the opening sequence of The Godfather, political parties come and go, drugs not to be dealt in the schoolyard, he’s not going to stand for that, his only client is blackmailing everybody who’s grafting, the cop who he waves to, a member of a family who gets all the contracts, everybody needs a job, selling out the country, giving away everything, everyone is corrupt, this fake insurgency, drain the swamp, maybe Westlake knows better than me, everything is corrupt and totally evil, the Westlake Review (website), this paragraph, intentions, played both ends against the middle, didn’t know who he was, the moral of the piece, a complete picture, not a soft book, a whole lot deeper than it appears, brilliantly, look on the surface like happy goofy comedies, just fun entertainment, in the middle of the night, subtle, year and year and years ago, early 80s, reading everything by him, The Fugitive Pigeon, a “nephew” novel, a throw away line, used to write crossword puzzles for a living, the poet is on the pumpkin (five letters), 40 years later, Frost!, always working, he’s really good at that, a mystery novel, he wrote those, his science fiction books, it has a mystery in it, that’s not really what it’s about, hanging out with a good guy, a corrupt jerk?, evil guy?, pretty fuckin evil, oh man!, filming the ending, prefer Cathy be killed, it hits harder, underscores the point more, we care whether he does or not, that’s why we don’t need any more, a girl like her is a dime a dozen, figuring out where to end a story, figuring out where to beginning a story, I didn’t mean to read the whole thing, make sure the file is all there, 100 something pages into it, amazing, a page of opening lines of Parker novels, When the phone rang the Parker was in the garage killing a man, the night apron man, a mirror of him, unusual moniker, he glanced at me, ex-middleweight, his suit was brown and old, better to hide the gun with, it is that, he agreed, that’ll help, being sarcastic to each other, what’s this Smith’s front name?, a whole lot of buildup, writing stuff, writing stuff, keep your typewriter ribbon wet, quick, get it done, a little bit of revision, writing a novel is different, you have to make it work, Westlake novels and Block novels, Westlake never wrote a bad novel, they’re not all The Score, Kahawa, the coffee one set in Kenya, still no audiobook of it, Swahili for coffee, the reign of Idi Amin, very powerful, you don’t think politics, near Aruba, a non-fiction book coup, very interested in politics, in constructing this book, can we reconstruct how it was constructed, a full time writer, he writes, he observes people, with that observer’s eye, trained to look for stories, driving up to Westchester, this town is different, he was a solider, probably in WWII, he goes to war again, boosting tires and selling them (maybe to the Nazis), he was in the army but he was corrupt, undercuts, we can’t sympathize with Parker because he’s inhuman, so efficient, commentary on people, he’s everyman, just wants to be comfortable, everybody wants to be comfortable, Citizens For Clean Government, a voice of reason and conscience, she was wrong to put her faith in him, why are you doing this, he has money in the bank, he could have, a way to say: have a look, here you go, Guy De Maupassant, a 1906/1907 reprint, retell the plot of a Maupassant story, observant of humans, the same taskmaster, there was a family friendship, Gustave Flaubert, train in the practice of fiction writing, go and walk about the town, really seen the things, make me see them, eagerly write, the most essential points, send him out again, he had seen nothing whatsoever, little by little, this discipline trained the mind, the fewest possible words, a perfect etching, a wonderful observer, in his 30th year, Ball Of Fat, everyone instantly recognized, a new writer of great power, 200 or more short stories, a writer’s writer, Stephen King, named his own pseudonym, Richard Bachman, how sublte he is, he doesn’t hit you over the head, understated, who wrote this book, it was Westlake, he does this thing with character’s hands, they spread their hands, particular personality types, to talk to the first representative, hands going all over the place, a Westlakism, observing, play with your hands a lot, observing a real thing, a few that do, perfect little chracterization, a signature by Westlake, in his comic books, dialogue with somebody’s whole body, seek to incorporate, in this particular case, hands waving all over the place, not just personality, how emotionally invested, specific examples, page 40, the scene, page 39, we are only interested in dishonesty in government, the town: Winston, 1 tavern which stays open, pays bribes to the patrolman on the beat, the crime of staying open, the crime of accepting bribes, the CCG, seems very reasonable, the second gloss, moving the politics needle, changing the politics, 1 finger raised, icy enthusiasm, he had memorized it because he liked it, the reason is what the reason is, honest local citizens, cop on the beat, slight trace, stylistic reasons, can’t help but be comedic, he didn’t talk he wrote out loud, an honest patrolman, he spread his hands and smiled once more, by ending the first crime, the permission or even assistance, wipe out governmental crime, dandy theory, liable to be just as money hungry, a permanent incorruptible watchful guard, an aroused and aware citizenry, keep the crooks out forever, some of it would be more than useful in our fight against corruption, turns out he’s naive, he’s right, the scales are lifted from your eyes, you really believe that, oh no, the follow-up scene, come clean as it were, pretty clear he knows the score, he’s like us, because he doesn’t see it, it doesn’t happen, ai manipulation in this genocide, he wouldn’t come at it directly, very very subtle book, the political issues of the day, The Spy In The Ointment, Up Your Banners, a pacifist secret agent, passivist political organization, it’s funny, politics of the 1960s, public schools in New York, a humorous story, generally funny, one of the most serious books, inverted humour, you don’t understand something until it makes you laugh, recognition, handling serious subjects with the lightest of touch, compare him to Block, a little more overtly political, The Thief Who Couldn’t Sleep, joins every revolution, an uprising in Tanganyika, La Guardia airport, was it political, thought process, if I say yes the conversation is over, oh ok, a political movement then it is okay, very subtle, it doesn’t come across, a short story, The Spy In The Elevator, Curious Facts, dystopia hellscape, in a dystopian novel in a short story, funny funny little world, it’s Socrates and the myth of the cave, they don’t know there’s an external reality, how great is Westlake, superlatives, Tolkien and Westlake, subtlety, look for the signs, so smooth, literally great, he’s GREAT, undercut by how digestible it is, spoonful of sugar, a very sour book, it went down real easy, this is a poison pill, that’s well measured, he did it real well, his theater influence, performing and producing, adept at getting into people’s heads, stage stuff, the worst actor, doing bad acts, performer, very well done, that guy’s like me, doesn’t know what to do with hands, he can’t help himself, hard-boiled book, the sandwich gets shot, and the formica, are really hardboiled book, pick up another Westlake, Westlakes to read, Westlakes that I have read, a chihuahua having a nervous breakdown, not much that we can do, Westlake.com website’s down, a Japanese adaptation of The Axe, a Michael Caine movie that’s similar, quite long for a Westlake, Robert Duvall, none of them are right, he laughs in that one, the best adaptation, not Mel Gibson, the spirit of it, not Jathan Stathem, the one called Parker, a mashup of The Hunter and Slayground, City Of Industry, not an official adaptation, very much a Parker plot, The Sour Lemon Score, much too subtle, pacifist secret agent, Up Your Banners, a schoolteacher during desegregation of public schools, inverted humour, you don’t really understand something until it makes you laugh, don’t want to be dumb, because of recognition, handling serious subjects, with the lightest of touch, tennis game, overtly political, The Thief Who Couldn’t Sleep, joins every revolution, an uprising in Tanganyika, Dancing Aztecs, Pedro Ninny, was it political?, if I say yes the conversation is over, The Spy In The Elevator, so light and fluffy, dystopian hellscape, a dystopian novel in a dystopian hellscape in a short story, Socrates in the myth of the cave, an external reality, reject it, how great is Westlake, comparing to superlatives, so smooth, he’s GREAT, undercut by how digestible it is, a very sour book, went down real easy until the war starts, a poison pill, well measured, his theater influence, performing and producing, adept at getting into people’s heads, stage stuff, the worst actor, doesn’t know what to do with hands, a hardboiled book, the sandwich gets shot, don’t forget about the formica, pick up another Westlake, chihuahua nervous breakdown, movies come out, a new adaptation of The Axe, a Michael Caine movie, who was the best Parker, Robert Duvall, he laughs in that one, the best adaptation, not Mel Gibson, the spirit of it, Jason Statham, City Of Industry (1997), Harvey Keitel, at a stoplight, Reservoir Dogs, almost Parker scenes, his own stuff, Cops And Robbers is a good movie, the book is better, Robert Redford, The Hot Rock, with him it’s the words, and the perfomances, he puppeteers those characters, the Dortmunder/Kelp relationship, George C. Scott, a comedy of errors, habitual crime, softboiled, the best Parker novel?, The Man With The Getaway Face, Westlake writing about Dortmunder, a hot potato, Bank Shot, supplemental characters, a lot like cheers, Drowned Hopes, for Scott, Humans, His own Creation, ragtag collection of human misfits, a fireman from Chernobyl, The Last Novel You Will Ever Read, more public domain novels, send it to Scott, too expensive, ex-wife took his books, grounds for divorce, front seat of the van, The Comedy Is Finished, Bob Hope and his illegitimate son, more Westlake is always good, National Enquirer, Trust Me On This, Baby Would I Lie, Florida based vacations, he knew somebody, so vividly, too well, The Cutie (The Mercenaries), Hard Case Crime, shy away, the punk was innocent, find that cutie before the cutie, The Busybody, 361, Brothers Keepers, Bank Shot is only 6 hours, no massive violence, cronies, The Capitalists And Immigrants Trust, ditch the bank, Kelp’s nephew, gangbusters, Herman X, a lockman, black militant, pirated version, The Girl Of My Dreams read by Roddy McDowell, Don’t Ask, Get Real, tabloid ones, What’s So Funny, Sin Hellcat with Lawrence Block, I’m sold, 4 hour 4 minutes, probably wrote it in a weekend, a nice way to kill a few hours, erotica, Adios Scheherazade, A Likely Story, The Stepfather, an alternative proposal, Too Much by Donald Westlake, a comedy, a movie, kind of a comedy, a gimmick cover, a special name for that, some fuzzy texture over part of the cover, bikinis, remove the fuzzy pink stuff, on camera, Melanie Griffith and Antonio Banderas, Daryl Hannah, a lot deeper, goofy sex comedy, the main character ends up not being who you think he is, a warning, cute and cuddly on the surface and murderous underneath, today’s narrator Ben Tuck, a 45 minute commute, reading Conan, three or four months later, read a Solomon Kane story, ready for another Conan, space em out, you don’t want to spend your whole week with Jesse, too recently, flexible, a Two Much Easter egg, the greeting card company, a rather ridiculous memory, real world stuff, fictional stuff, Detour by Martin M. Goldsmith, nice and short, there’s a movie version, considered a b-movie classic, the book is way better, wrote 2 episodes of the original Twilight Zone, movie scripts, the nuking of New York, a realtime nuking, from the 1940s, a hitchhiker, across the desert, injuries sustained earlier, he buries him in the desert, a girl at a gas station, what’d you do with the body?, backstory, halfway through the book, she’s got her own affair going on, really good narrative voice, really solid book, a prewar book, some co-writing on movies, wreck your life, The Princess Bride, nothing of theirs is never published again, making money writing, screenplays, writing into the void, moved back away from Hollywood, so lucky, treasure, sounds fun, how can you know, until you start running out, there I was, Tim Powers, his first book that’s still around, Laser Books, Dinner at Deviant’s Palace, they’re not the same guy, Westlake is much more prudish, broader humour and less dry, got a lot more sex in it than anything else he’s written, did he go to Africa for that?, something that actually happened, people involved in the heist, repay the people, by never mentioning their names, we’ve done Sin Hellcat, Westlake wrote a superhero story, The Busy Body, Brother And Sister, in for a treat, yay incest!, do I have to?, 3 hours 25 minutes, not horrible, his enthusiasm is not in it, downmarket swamp, Swamp Hoyden, a boisterous girl, Nudist Camp by Orrie Hitt, Veronica by Donald Westlake, write a lot of them, a real novel with a stupid premise, write me a book to match this title, the Block one we did, The Triumph Of Evil, assassinating the president, not as dark as that, this book sneaks up on you, The Anderson Tapes, Such Men Are Dangerous, Hit Man, collects stamps, numismatist and philatelist, travels across the country, a woman who books his hits, a weird philosophical I’m a hitman and a nice guy, regular characters, levity, just fun, this matter-of-factness of the characters, how many Bloch shorts have you read, he’ll take the silliest little idea of a story, Alfred Hitchcock Mystery Magazine, nice jeans, it’s hard to get good jean, dog food factory, that’s the whole story, dogfood out of humans, gets paid both ways, little twist of the knife, did fantastic, opportunities to jabber on about your favourite books, I loved that book, finding people to talk about ai, an old guy from the 60s, take that chihuahua for some food, cruising right along, trained up, going to work, a white lab, a yellow lab that’s platinum, lab coat, a lot of fun, very active dude, throw the ball, loves to retrieve, watch it roll by, threaten to steal the ball, homeland in newfoundland, see the old country, 4 day visit, uncles and aunts and cousin, she wanted to have a farm, 50 years, a goose, 2 calves born recently, a million chickens, turkeys, wanting to get up at 4am, all-in, since she was a little girl, getting her wish, starting new people every month, on and on, almost like you’re training people, certify-em then train-em, old job, Florida parking garage, small town Idaho, pumice factory, cement blankets, Technovelgy (Bill Christensen), a culvert or ditch, burlap embeded with cement, spray it, makes an instant contoured bank, a hard foundation, pumice for cement, fluffing it up, regular cement and rebar, very flat, students love stories, really?, yes indeed, might learn something this way, control systems, little piece of tech, Mr. Spock was Scott’s Mr. Rogers, not engineer Scott, the guy that was relied on, the miracle work, transporters are bullshit, this is a nebula, we can drink ourselves into it, the space hippies one, he’s interested in them, convinces Kirk, overdone, meet some millenials, different customs and lifestyles, as a gen-x er, who wrote that one, The Way To Eden, D.C. Fontana, he’s on the crew, he wrote The Sound Of Music, Arthur Heinemann, The Wink Of An Eye, Space Lincoln!, a lot of dumb things, riles me up, seems like a nice guy, Bear Island, Alistair MacLean, bin full, can you read it to me?, pass it around, Fortnite, more cartoony version, building, High Adventure, Samuel Holt is Donald Westlake, I Know A Trick Worth Two Of That, giant Tor, from his time in Hollywood, an ex-actor, a cross between James Garner and Tom Selleck, drives a fancy car, gets involved in crimes, people saw him as a private detective on TV, a bin, bins full of books, how do we get people to do audiobooks, no possibility of keeping them online, Quasar Spectra, Meteor Strike by Donald Westlake, crusin for a brusin, 1965, pre-90s science fiction, new stuff all the time, The Robot Who Looked Like Me by Robert Sheckley, Solar Shoe Salesman, John Sladek making fun of Philip K. Dick, good narration, quite a few new audiobook people on utube, we’re lucky, living in a glorious time, also horrible, find some coffee, throw the ball for dog, having a helluva time, it has become impossible to sell books, used to be, unless pretty obscure, zero views, ebay, facebook marketplace, good pricing and fast moving, a bookseller, stack of stuff, goodwill store, signed and numbered, at some point your putting in effort to get less than a reward, stacks and stacks, new used books, unless scanning, this is a book!, a problem, work book group, not the best thing in the world, Dungeon Crawler Carl, litRPG, got a cat with him, 2020, pretty popular, a romance, the median is new, that’s the problem, Ben-Hur or Beowulf, if you’ve read the author before, toss a Westlake over the wall, if it is on kindle, what happened to the estate, everything went ebook, a shame, One Of Us Is Wrong, no ebook, when will there be one?, a hardcover for $25, used bookstores have been disappearing, thrift shop, they still have books, used bookstores, we’re at the price floor situation, Alien Earth episodes, strung out, it’s ok, the boy wonder facebook guy, the lost boys, the lost girl wendy, Raised By Wolves, fun premise, petered out nothing happened, Timothy Olyphant, another mom and dad style robot, interstellar flight, raising humans, decanted on the other planet, raised by robots, kinda like a science fiction novel premise, stuff happens is the worst thing ever, it’s the fetch quest starting, I can turn it off, Mission Impossible movie, two-parter, a summing up of all the Mission Impossible movies, giant fetchquest, what it really was, Collosus The Forbin Project, the badguy is an ai, spend all our time saying Tom Cruise is Jesus, do we trust, the anti-god, it’s all on the surface, why we got to save the planet this time, about nothing, good parts but, the surface depths, nothing from the ai’s point of view, climbing, falling, stuff happening very well, a strong idea, a painful idea, how can we do better than that?, luck on your Dungeon Crawl with Carl, a good talk out it?, allowed to say bad things, if nobody loves the book already, if favourite writer, we could do better, you’re wrong we can never be friends again, none of them are bad, traumatizing, thank you sir.

Killing Time

Posted by Jesse Willis