The SFFaudio Podcast #897 – READALONG: The Great Impersonation by E. Phillips Oppenheim

The SFFaudio Podcast #897 –Jesse and Alex (Pulpcovers) talk about The Great Impersonation by E. Phillips Oppenheim

Talked about on today’s show:
family names, English people are weird, disappointing, what year this book came out, a prolific writer, the reader’s digest version, it’s really cool, no one else has read it, post WWI, it has to be 1920, there’s a movie in 1921, a weird and good book, the ending obviously, four different things going on, the 39 steps meets The Prisoner Of Zenda, a lot more swordfighting, talk about previous swordfights, he fell on my sword, came away with a broken arm, it skips all the fun in a certain sense, subdues Robert Urthank, smokin, alcohol, a lot of guns on birds, like it a lot, the only way it could be constructed, a new student, choose your own adventure book, if you do this turn to page 18, death, premature imprisonment in a skull mountain, the best ending, rewrite this as a Choose Your Own Adventure, do you drink the whiskey?, at some point in the narrative, the author tricks us, a possibility, really suspicious, my fake wristwatch that I don’t have, that’s a slip-up if…, the main character is called by his proper name by the narrator of the book, the twist is he’s not lying, it comes out of nowhere, a clever book, oooh!, The Sixth Sense, sitting around in rooms with a little kid, a good twist, missed the twist, the revelation which was kinda cool, massively improved, do you go on another hunt?, do you go in the black wood?, is this a little Hound Of The Baskervilles thing too, her brother who’s mentally deficient, we don’t have the butler, we’re supposed to be in on it, very cool, how can you do this to me?, I was not your buddy Leopold, does the book play fair?, misses something he should have known, I’ve been gone for so long, he also was gone for a long time, a teenager, a trick for us, in on the secret, the German guy, we will expand!, we need breathing room, use this for inspiration!, take my papers, hold them for me, two documents that are opposite, Germans are nice fellows, evil conquerors, in combination with the black wood, haunted place from the past, a body buried there, Baron Ragstein, his own demon in his backstory, his real demon?, fought a man and was exiled, mirroring, at Oxford, both at the same school, one is charged with the other’s bills at school, a nice little touch, a very good condensation of scenes in the book, other Universal Horror movies, a werewolf story, the calling in the night, a fakeout, clearing the black wood, the resolution of the valance, which is he?, the spy or the counter spy, he’s the hero, we never see him meeting with the British, the white linen, what happened in Africa, Africa changes a man, the cousin, Africa, India, all the same, the women are black and there’s lots of beasts, he took the Baron’s money, and followed the Baron’s plan, quite striking, guys gone to seed, the first of his name not to waste all his money, degenerate, regenerate, the family line always degenerates, a Lovecraftian family, in the basement eating your friend, I’m paying off the family debts, his skin looks better, standing a little straighter, like you’ve been a military uniform, a great surprise as a possibility, the author knew what he was doing the whole time, turning old novels into Choose Your Own Adventures, poor student, every poor kid, The Great Gatsby, a rich guy observed by an acquaintance/friend, the very first Hard Case Crime book, Grifter’s Game, conmen, a supersolid horrible noir awesome ending, the lobby was air conditioned, his tone apologetic, every stinking dive, palm up, he liked to receive it, a great opening, the girl is tied to the chair, making her a heroin addict, the great dissipation, you don’t want to have him for a boyfriend, great writing carries you from page to page, overly long, the lack of action, The Thirty Nine Steps is a bad book in a certain sense, written during the war, a spy book, a chase sequence, Rogue Male by Geoffrey Household, at the Eagle’s Nest, some SS guards discover him, he goes to ground on the run the whole book, it never says Adolph Hitler, a WWI book with the knowledge of WWII, awesome pace, what’s going to happen next, Hitchcock movies, this is a spy book, is it though?, you’ve got a secret mission, what’s the special mission?, elected maybe?, an English nobleman that’s secretly a German spy, spend all this money, we will back you to the hilt, the meeting with the Kaiser, a cameo, Arnold Schwarzenegger playing Kaiser Wilhelm, over muscled Kaiser, we’re going to win World War One, a fluff piece of fun, a really good twist, not as tight or compelling as Lawrence Block, pre-war English dialogue, not well remembered, The Black Arrow by Robert Louis Stevenson, his poetry for children, Treasure Island, how often have you thought about Kidnapped, Strange Case Of Dr Jekyll And Mr Hyde, it has been spoiled, it is very possible…, the way the book was written, bad writing?, the Englishman was seen in Africa and was not dead, he’s in the room with us right now!, the rumor is true?, the way the book handles this is to never give a definitive reaction from our viewpoint character, too long for what the idea does, Dr. Jekyll is Mr. Hyde, a cool idea, Two-Face, a man who is both men, it works better as a film, never being inside somebody’s head, the camera goes to their pov, or over narration, doing the original star wars with old Luke, narrating the events of the original star wars, I didn’t know at the time, now I’m a blue milk addict, you can do things with viewpoint, on a desert island, Chagos, Prisoner Of Zenda everytime, on every page level, piled up coincidence, sparky and fluffy, almost a play, drinking and meetings, a little romance, the romance storylines, falling in love with Lady Domini, she’ll find you out, she’s a very nice kid, Hungarian princess, unrolls the scroll, their both in exile in Africa, killed a guy, disgraced and can’t come home, a collision in Africa, the way I’m going to kill him, very very salty, passive aggressive way of killing somebody, fighting to the death off-screen, the flashback to that fight at the end, make the whole movie filled with lots of flashbacks, Memento (2000), tell the story backwards, nice awesome noir reveal, have meaning in his life, the only thing that matters is me, companion books, now let’s see it from the other guy’s point of view, which universe you’re in, a burning desire to live, that setup at the beginning, that contrast at the beginning, beaten down and thin, the shakes from the alcoholism, erect Prussian, definitely the German guy, turned his entire life around, that’s the mental work we have to do, if you’re not second guessing the book review already, a goodreads review, 1 star, is that guy lying to me, you used to have curly hair?, can you grow out of curly hair?, a very girl book, lack of outdoor action, The Count Of Monte Cristo by Alexandre Dumas, a swordfighty action movie, no a brooding plotter, clockwork vengeance machine, swordfights with people, work em in there, it would make sense for either persona, on the riverbank, the most interesting character, madman, the schoolteacher, a nice period piece, rowing, the fencing team, a big smite on his face, a secret scar, why he can’t get undressed with his wife, new scars, a birthmark, arm break, not a short book for what it is doing, that big a disparity, Timeline by Michael Crichton, condensation, the movie just zips along, a few too many filler scenes, repetition, adapt this well into a film, fun movie stuff, the definite film version of this is yet to be made, Trading Places (1983), The Prince And The Pauper by Mark Twain, Double Star by Robert A. Heinlein, inherit the kingdom, they’re both barons or a baronet, a woman back home who’s mad/in love with him, injuries and deaths on both sides, the balancing act for the mirror, William Wilson by Edgar Allan Poe, for the present, a call me Ishmael situation, making a joke about the publication, this other kid, degenerate gambler, reflected badly on the narrator, a long short story, stabbed in a swordfight, split personality, a split self, which one am I, The Prestige, a very good book, an estate in it, a weird dark land, a confection, a bon bon, very delicious, greatly declined, the Star that was E. Phillips Oppenheim, lost authors, no champion, Mr. Grex Of Monte Carlo, 2 books a year for years and years, the concept binds him in certain ways, the secret he wants to reveal, knife’s edge, a certain distancing effect upon the reader, imagine this as a Hard Case Crime book, the first 16 cover proofs, what Charles Ardai was doing, he took a Sherlock Holmes story and published it as by A.C. Doyle, a screaming lady in a nightgown, contractually obligated, I wanna tell stories about the KKK, the mormons, playfulness of an author in his element, a good place to be for a reader, in contrast, some people on the internet are either biobots or dumb, a photograph of some books at the drugstore, food deserts, book deserts, you have to walk into a driver, the newsstand, the spinner rack, the gas station, stumble across things, more and more unusual, the oasis of the library, free books on the internet, you have to go find them, confronted by things that attract your eye, a bbq place with great smells, thousands of views, silly comments, too many James Patterson and Bill Clinton, who wrote this book?, a Stephen King, new paperbacks out now, a wasteland, the same thing is happening with movies, kids these days are not watching movies, never watches movies, old movies, so many rereleases of classic movies, not the reboot, make another couple million bucks, once the culture of film becomes so backward looking, breaks that cultural transmission, theatre, the stuff they put out is limited, an apartment near Broadway, some variety, elitist, ballet, new operas, performing the Nutcracker a dozen times a year, a high culture low culture, horse racing and dog racing, just degenerate gamblers, just dog food, if you thought that it had value, subsidization is another scam, lots of scams going on, the point of the movie The Producers was, something special about the book one, the codex as we don’t often call it, the paperback, the publicity materials, they did the thing, “pulp revival”, Pulpcovers.com, noir and hardboiled, fantasy, high fantasy, low fantasy, dragon on a big pile of gold, little invisible guy, The Black Arrow, N.C. Wyeth, anything N.C. Wyeth draws you in, Men Of Iron by Howard Pyle, a movie, 1891, a student of Howard Pyle, impulsive rash, hard knocks, carefully watched and guided, a key player, too many possibles, early boy’s adventure, middle school, a big tournament, barely stand, lifted by a crane, that’s not how armour worked, maybe Crichton read that, responding to it, no one could possibly move in this armour, much tougher guys, speaking with authority, using other sources to make this claim, ignore the weird Victorian ideas about how armour worked, betrayal the Prince of Wales, who’s responsible, Sir Walter Scott is responsible for all of this stuff?, Ivanhoe, 1819, the other Waverly books, more influenced by Waverly and Ivanhoe than any other cultural phenomenon, plays and books, other than music, less about story, patriotism, Charles Dickens, an industry unto himself, now we’re James Patterson, a crest to this wave, John Buchan is not the beginning of the wave, books start coming into their height?, as soon as you get paperbacks, cheap entertainment, mass market, that attraction of the cover, grab the workman on his way to the cover, a scantily clad screaming lady on the cover, with a brass bra and a leg cling, beware of the 3 volume novel, Oscar Wilde’s, if not him, the cheapest thing is ticktock, reconstruct his life, wait until sleep comes, they’re watching youtube shorts and tiktok shorts, it’s right there in your hand, riding a bike while looking at his phone, everybody is looking at his phone, listening to my phone, consuming video, playing a video, this is the new phenomenon, a very heavy hardcover from school, the death of…, did the book industry do it to themselves, Hollywood definitely did it to themselves, easier lower common denominator, cheap and easy, trying to relax, mass market entertainment, Doritos taste better than celery sticks, project right into my eyeballs, old tv, a lot of writers from books, a lot of plays, adaptations of stuff, regular broadcast tv, unbelievable, 9-1-1, everybody on the show is retarded, a fire in space episode, I can’t believe this got produced, the thing that used to produce Star Trek and The Twilight Zone, even easier, free, the most addictive possible content, plugged directly into your brain, the Larry Niven, a tasp, just pure pleasure, the way you get interested in the theatre, essentially dead as the major media, a skinsuit of was the most popular medium at one time, Lincoln was shot in a theatre, shot by an actor too, the music hall, if you want to see this play played out, the best actors, the perfect version of it, why would you go to the theatre, further down that path, it was always low-brow, the friction was the point, as things get easier they become worse, computer games, super compelling, home computer, school computer, that’s where the money is, a little more interesting, guys in their 50s, I wish my kid would just play a game, watching livestreams of other people playing games, games teach stuff, stuff about geography, almost every time it’s some singer or a video game, the literary people can’t get work in literary places, independent, a guy in Finland making Lovecraft games, popular culture, this legacy of older stuff, not born into the pulp or paperback industry, are we the weird outliers?, it’s awesome, we can find an old book and appreciate it, lost treasure, enjoy it, appreciate it for what it was doing at the time, a level of appreciation, whoe’ver’s listening to this, 80s and 90s kids watching movies from the 50s and 60s, Lawrence Of Arabia, I heard it is really good, short attention span, the Jake Paul of authors, a modern sequel of The Cannonball Run, Camille Paglia and Slavoj Zizek, slop videos, I’ll do anything for attention, the personalities have changed, the rat pack guys, Dean Martin, Sammy Davis Jr, pretending to be priests, a couple of hot girls in a Lamborghini, guy who thinks he’s a superhero, It’s a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World (1963), already old, middle aged people in the audience, Buster Keaton, Spencer Tracey, Don Notts shows up, that pool of people who fit that mold, Jack Chan was introduced to the world, Jamie Farr, Roger Moore’s biggest fan, facial surgery to look like Roger Moore, that meta-stuff, weird reality, what’s the mcguffin?, just the pleasure of having done the race, bragging rights, trace it all down, the blame on lack of land reform, 1958?, the newsstand corporation, the kid who inherited or whatever, distributing books and magazines, in 1953, in 1958, down to 10?, back to 4, no distribution means no eyes on magazines, tv from the 1950s, shifting tastes, a lot of it went to paperbacks, a whole different channels, comic book stores, even that’s not doing well, vhs was a new distribution system, laserdisc and all that stuff, early access, you don’t understand it, it may have gone terribly, Gilbert and Sullivan, expensive, don’t live in England in the 19th century, some new medium before the tasp, vr stuff happen, the theory there, get all that exercise, watch someone else streaming, the rise of livestreaming videogames, so passive, mostly scams, massive amounts of scams, corporate subsidies to political ones, look at the chat, almost not even words, strings of emojis, people alone looking at a guy playing a game, not particularly interesting or smart, a lot of euphemism, bizarre and pathetic, complaining about pulp magazines being badly written, are they James Patterson bad, incompetent filler, the editors did a pretty decent job of rejecting stuff, professional editors, next month’s issue, this was a lot of fun, good stuff now?, hype for things of the present vs. hype for things of the past, it is happening, a new John Lange novel, the drawer book, A Murder In Hollywood by Michael Crichton, not co-authored, a Tom Clancy in that picture too, an Agatha Christie, you can’t trust it, there’s an estate there, fucked with her whole career, And Then There Was One, out of copyright, less likely to have bad books out there, rewrote The Cats Of Ulthar as a cute story for children, baby’s first Cthuhlu, Dr. Seuss versions of Lovecraft, pre-ai, The Tomb, print editions probably still being made, cheap public domain classics, in one volume, faux leather, slap the gutenberg text in there, new introduction if you’re lucky, all about the money, not about the ideology, an honest mercenary, Ian Fleming, the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang Guy, all Canadian public domain, through and past, Jurassic Park, a month out, “so so”, that’s fair, so okay it’s average, the book has merit, hauled into its saddle and can’t fight on its own, see you on twitter.

The Great Impersonation by E. Phillips Oppenheim

Posted by Jesse Willis

The SFFaudio Podcast #896 – AUDIOBOOK: The Great Impersonation by E. Phillips Oppenheim

The SFFaudio Podcast #896 – The Great Impersonation by E. Phillips Oppenheim, read by Tom Weiss.

This novel was first published in 1920.

This UNABRIDGED AUDIOBOOK (7 hours 56 minutes) comes to us courtesy of LibriVox.org.

The next SFFaudio Podcast will feature our discussion of it!

POCKET BOOKS - The Great Impersonation by E. Phillips Oppenheim

Posted by Jesse Willis

The SFFaudio Podcast #884 – AUDIOBOOK/READALONG: The Valley Of Spiders by H.G. Wells and Valley Of The Lost by Robert E. Howard

The SFFaudio Podcast #884 – The Valley Of Spiders by H.G. Wells (24 minutes) read by Robert Dickson for LibriVox and Valley Of The Lost by Robert E. Howard (41 minutes) read by Tommy Patrick Ryan, followed by a discussion. Participants in the discussion include Jesse, Alex (Pulpcovers), and Tommy Patrick Ryan

Talked about on today’s show:
other Jim Brill stories, The Mound, set in Texas, the same character in both?, a southern accent, a cowboy, valleys and spiders, other stories with valleys and spiders, a novel by Samuel Delany, listening to him talk about it, gay garbagemen who open a pornographic movie theater, later on they become handymen for a lesbian colony, asking around the robots, fetches reviews, the spiders are metaphorical, dude, spiders and spiderwomen go together, the female creature, a gender flipped vampire, brides of Dracula, Carmilla, LEGO minifigs, Medusa, the Spider Woman, Tiger Girl, a story here, 10 minutes to read aloud, connect these 2 stories, The White Death by Don Mark Lemon, he was an American, Virginia, South America, Mexican guide, in Tarantula Valley?, is it a pestilence of some kind, a snake?, no senor, poisonous gases, banditi?, half savage as he was, queer, policy, treble it, American gold, stack a mortgage, a Catholic, meet the White Death, superstitious, well armed, Winchester, the infernal poet, a diseased poet, with one by his side, sylvan charm, two burros, snake, buzzards, a half-wild burro, somehow, the man fools around the ear of a friend, such quick tracks, three dirty streaks of light, strangest of all, the witness of his own eyes, collections of bones, a open air cosmopolitian graveyard, the cat tribe, a cow, skeleton of a man, the prey of a month or so, a second collection, bleaching in the sun, the third day, what manner of thing it was, a great panther of some kind?, a huge snake?, then he struck gold, down the river in search of game, the latest feeding ground of the Thing, a cool million, try to bag something, proceed to watch, a huge collection of boulders, scratch her sweetheart’s name in the dirt, her name, his own name, more like spades than the human heart, his brains were tangled, 6X3 is 18, squatted upon the pile of rock, he couldn’t do other than watch, not the slightest noise, a gigantic spider, large as a full grown tiger, why, talking or thinking, the light that came out of the eyes, deprived him as the power of motion, the long white hair, intense heat, the 30 foot spring, maudlin lips, “mother”, flashed before his soul, the face had the mouth of his sweetheart, laugh foolishly like a baby, flaccid and flabby, through the hot air, horrible fangs, now I lay me down to sleep, he’s amazing right?, intense little story, a giant snake, massively oversized, the two covers, Forgotten Fantasy, guy on a horse and spider, 1966, Magazine Of Horror, guy on a horse and a giant spider, barely got any spiders in it, a spider cover, super-science fictiony, familiar, The Noseless Horror, another one, werewolf in Louisiana, the mummy one, the dude who went to Mongolia, it is kinda awesome, the number of things that Robert E. Howard does in that story, stack up, a laser beam, a tv movie in the 1970s, The Stone Tape, Nigel Kneale, audio recording company, they bought a castle, the resonance of this chamber, recording people’s experiences in the actual stone, tape doesn’t exist when Robert E. Howard was writing this, television is legit, Electrical Experimenter, recipes for making your own television, mechanical television, amazing and terrible, cathode ray tubes make it viable, so much science fiction ideas, transforming into Genghis Khan, give my wife as a gift to the mongols, jammed together in 10 pages, the Philip K. Dick and the Anne McCaffrey, Alex is fine, in spanish the vowels always make the same sound, unless dipthong, British Columbia goldrushes, reading along, it was good, the better one, of the three, the Wells had a certain ambiance to it, the gaunt man, the silver bridled man, Chinese accent, an Austrian, Arnold Schwarzenegger, it was fine, the Robert E. Howard, the aftermath, they’re escape, the disintegration ray, still happening, still talking, nothing useful, so much stuff that happens, the D&D escape from the castle, more like Gamma World, it’s not a weird western, it’s science fiction with a cowboy, a revolver?, acp 1911, he’s a cowboy, draw really fast, a cowboy in Mongolia, adapted into a Conan The Barbarian Annual drawn by Gil Kane, a whole battle sequence, Hyrkanians, a mission from Nemedia (not Texas), whenever lifting from the descriptions of the actual story it is good, to fill out the length there’s a circle around twice, Afghanistan, where the evil super-science lives, Genghis Kahn’s tomb, off-limits, sounds found, a forbidden plateau of leng, pretty small, not super important, giant spider, he did a monkey man, runs off screen, save it for the show, a great loneliness of tableland, a woman who has fled with one of the native servants, muted, mestizo, metis, mixed people, a summary of the story with characters, where are you getting the character names from, in the actual text, desciptions and pronouns, “the man”, “lord”, courser companions, waxed mustache, half-breed tracker, poet-like?, explicitly triggered, the insight about ai, Our Opinions Are Correct, people who don’t think like Jesse, science fiction related, on bluesky, almost enough said, don’t get tricked, WWII, Tolkien would hate that, he abhors allegory, Gandalf is kinda like Churchill, if Tolkien denies it later, “so done with Lovecraft”, an interview with Alec Nevalla Lee, Buckminster Fuller, the boss of his community, editor of weird tales, gross and disgusting, pejorative stuff, ugly red hair, the ugly part, good or bad, the argument describing it as good or bad, the one we weren’t supposed to do, awesome, the most interesting and difficult, pursing, mestizo, mixed race, started questioning about the H.G. Wells story, combing it for facts, not explicitly, not Africa, a little too much happening, where is the spanish?, half-breed, silver bride, Argentina, hint, Latin America, a tracker, west, commands a whole city, they have swords, Winchesters, why this story is so weird, medieval armor, a Norman helmet, why it is so interesting, what are all 3 of these stories about?, they’re all about going into unknown places, before we lose this thread, just waking up for Wells, picturing Eastern, New England, England, West Virginia, escaped woman, Appalachian weird, Deliverance (1972), not explicitly wrong, a hallucination, or interpretation, the Howard is pretty good and very fun, fun to read, compelling, what was going to happen, 25 minutes, the Howard dragged at the end, superfluous, paid by the word, rough draft, submitted, rejected, couple of weeks tweaking it, an afternoon pass, an incredibly confused history, stories published later, mistook this story for another story, The Lost Valley As Iskander, Afghanistan, crunchable media, submitted to Strange Tales, announced in the last issue and then never published, profiting by it now, multiple magazines, a story by Jack London, no supernatural element, what kinda story this is, War by Jack London, guys on horses at war at an unknown place at an unknown time, comb through it, the only indication of where it is, apples grow all over, a temperate zone, a deciduous forest, winters and summers, the point of that story, people in combat are on two teams, there’s no context clues, that’s deliberate, trying to read it as South America, make it super generic, so as to create and effect, sorted soon, the mistiness, the effect he was going for, it could be anywhere, what they’re skin tone was, are they white men, pictured as white, the kinda jerks they are chasing down this woman, whatever the deal was, white men tend to be the kind that control other people, happening subconsciously, there is one point, these white men, incredibly present, names and locations, kinds of trees, white is pointed out, the lord is shitting on white horses, the back end of the story, damned white horses, what is the final line of the story and why is that?, as he rode he picked his way, many dead spiders on the ground, feasted guilty on there fellows, in the Conan adaptation, their time had passed, a winding sheet ready, a nautical term, where we get ghosts from, could do him little evil, flicked with his belt, dismount and trample them with his boots, spiders he muttered, I will spin a web, a very weird ending for this story, 3 guys go looking for a half-caste girl, towards colonialism, the target of this story, the class system, there’s three guys, two a servants, questions the leader, the back end of this story, I’m better than you, I’m also a coward, what makes you better?, what defeats the one guy in his pursuit is nature, white men?, white spiders, what does he mean by this, deliberately so, spins a web and waits, figure out a way to trap her, why valleys and spiders go together, a place that’s protected, an attic is full of spiderwebs because their webs will last, maybe the Robert E. Howard one is the one that doesn’t fit, most of the setup for the story, The Last Valley (1971) with Michael Caine, our wizard, he’s a scientist, a chain blocking the entrance, a roadblock, get zapped, electricity explained, he’s a wizard, quite terrible, elktro, I’m out, one of these stories is not like the other, there’s more than one, a bunch, in both, what could it be in the valley of the tarantuala?, Shelob, Ungoliant, Tolkien’s spiders the valley of shadows, the valley of nightmare, a valley in the first age, consumes herself, birthed out some children, regular spiders, a sign of his genius, the disintegration ray, point it like this, press this button, you will be our king, followed the instructions, Princess Leia on that gun shooting Genghis Kahn, a 6th or 7th level spell, press a button and have things turn to dust, Thanos-like, snap the fingers, genius yadda yadda, hot Chinese dancing girl and nobody wants her, I got a girl back home, he didn’t care for Chinese women, very hot, languorous view of her body, not gonna look too long, a White Stripes song, pretty good looking for a girl, that would have been weird at the time, Skull-Face, our hero goes after the Chinese girl, Egyptian or something?, dark haired foreign chick, the scary race shit, I’m fine with being Genghis Kahn, the most interesting part of the story, meditating Genghis Kahn’s chamber with a rock from outer space, what we see in The Grisly Horror, the werewolf story, from Tibet, Black Hound Of Death, to get the guy who got away, Texas to Mongolia, The Island Of Doctor Moreau, mutating, building man-creatures, degenerating people, the finale in the trailer, almost Big Trouble In Little China, that can’t be right, Buckaroo Banzai, fun for the whole family, the climactic fight sequence, what do you need him for?, he is the sidekick, point of view character, go to Chinatown, as a non-chinese person, almond cookies, the viewpoint, Jim Brill, Steve Brill?, Conan is reused, also a Conan story set in England?, a Bran Mac Morn story, why the Wells story is so interesting, stripping away things, The Valley Of The Blind, genetically blind, he thinks he can see things, acts like an asshole, the two hot things under his brow, very symbolics, the colour of these spiders is white, did the girl get away?, how did she get through, a day ahead of them, the spider wind might have missed her, some native knowledge here, a burrow in both, Don Mark Lemon, so delightful, now I lay me down to sleep, he turns into a baby, killing everyone and everything in the valley, two donkeys, talks to his donkey, that’s odd, maybe I should get my rifle, it’s beautiful I think, Wells is trying to make a point, different kinds of assholes, hubristic assholes, the little man, we’re both cowards, why are you my lord?, the amount of text devoted to it, where the Howard puts action they ave this conversation, both made of the same material, write you into this story, it isn’t really about spiders is it?, is this a science fiction story, giant monsters, nailed it on the Wells, his bridle is silver, two minutes later he abandons him, a wealth distribution thing, he’s trying to make it universal, that half-breed could be anywhere, people realizing this is an asshole, there is no justice, in the Howard there is justice, get konked on the head, Kim Stanley Robinson, great ideas, almost no plot, full of good ideas, what happens and what’s the point, besides entertainment, body horror, turning Japanese, moral horror, what’s it all about, gettin paid, more in the Wells, prefer the narrator did the Howard, British accent, these white men, deleted the word white, does it change the story at all, absolutely not about racism, defy his racial purity, half-caste, let’s look at the actions, colonialism has happened, as a modern thing, that guy who thinks he’s better than me, just fun adventure, inventive and fun, didn’t trust the natives, beautiful fun, he doesn’t pick up the rifle, the anti-Robert E. Howard, our mad scientist, he’s not a hero, what is the white death, a giant tarantula that’s white, mesmerism, 4 giant piles of bones, imma keep looking for gold, dialogue back and forth, really happy, back in Virginia, leaps 30 feet, white hopping death, funnier, The Black Cat, where Jack London was first published, the art is always cats, mushrooms growing, a piquancy, this magazine has a flavour, The Mansion Of Forgetfulness, very Edgar Allan Poe inspired, lost their girl, sits u in a chair, a purple ray makes you forget, he lost his girl at sea, you don’t remember me, meeting again for the first time, the Poe character names, science fiction before Amazing Stories, Howard is a much better entertainer, a pointed stab at people, something beautiful about the simpleness, spoilers is a 21st century invention, Luke Skywalker stabs the guy, podcasting and stuff like that, editor of old Weird Tolds, C.C. Senf spoiled the H.P. Lovecraft, they read that story because it sounds good, every H.P. Lovecraft story starts: yes it is true i sent 6 bullets through the head of my friend, but trust me, bro, you’re going to love this story!, go back to Nemedia, sex with her along the way, that’s not Jim Brill, the honorable guy, clearly in love with this guy’s wife, less honourable, in the middle of nowhere, for honour, if he were not so honourable, makes Tommy’s skin crawl, she was pretty, who is the hero?, we know, Jim Brill’s story Jim Brill is, in the Wells there’s no heroes, man is against man, what is the point of The White Death, well written, he sees in the face of his mother his girl’s lips, he turns into a baby, the white nape, going through the list, featuring the White Death, camping for the next three weeks, Lozo, how did he know not to go there, do not mention my name, I don’t know, anybody who goes there doesn’t come back, a very short story, some white thing, this white thing took them, a little gem, a little placer gold, playfully written, bent toward Robert E. Howard, the most enjoyable story to read, a complete story, not making the same kind of point, a little horror story, pretentions of literary fictionness, dreamland with no details, class and cowardice, what does that mean?, feels like a rough draft, which would be a good movie, a Twilight Zone that’s terrible, a great cartoon, not getting the comedy out of it, rewriting, so many good movie things, more work to do, rewrite a lot of things, she’d be there with him, Temple Of Doom, Willie Scott stuff, absolutely tolerable, not the actress’ fault, we’ve done the three now, as expertly read by Alex,short to the point, extra stuff, the Wells is in the middle, the most relevant, the most important, what is Robert E. Howard’s point? buy this magazine, entertainment value, social commentary, the one they give you at school, at least it is short, Reading, Short And Deep, another precursor to Weird Tales, funny little story, I love living in this house with you, goes to the hardware store for a hammock, follows a butterfly, comes back, can you get me a hammock?, three times, she doesn’t know what I’m talking about, she’s a spider-woman, his eyes had grown more accustomed to the dark, glue covered cords, a thing that had two luminous eyes set in a woman’s face, what is the point of this stupid story, making nests and trapping men, that’s really funny, is it sexist?, I’m in favour of it if it makes me laugh, keep seeing the signs, talking donkeys, it’s a cartoon, reading it on the page, random capitalization, name brand, where nothing is capitalized in the Wells, taking away all allusion, a giant tarantula that eats everybody, a tiger sized tarantula, explicitly set in Mexico, it’s South America, the Mexican was Catholic, Mexicans can travel to South America, I don’t speak Mexican, Norwegian, Swedish, and Danish, cross the border into Norway, these are our Norwegian hats, Spanish in Latin America vs. Argentina vs. Spain, my name is Thomas, s into a th, they really shuh, swallowing a potato, Australians, Kiwis, Britain, French Guiana, Mayor Pete, in Peru, people from France, working at a hostel, he knew Englsh, you speak so fast, your accent was weird, is it easier for you to understand me, the Pepe Le Pew accent, laughable, we are speaking French now, German accents = speaking German, you’ve got the accent, an impression of someone speaking Spanish, what was that word, the current Pope is an American, right after Tommy became Catholic, a new Pokemon, multiclassing, do yoga and sing in Sanskrit, when he speak Italian now, the Pope’s Italian is easy to understand for Americans, The Great Impersonation by E. Phillips Oppenheim, The Case Of Charles Dexter Ward, a wizard guy, drunken destitute British nobleman wandering around Africa, Eaton, Sandhurst!, mission from the German government, man do I love the Kaiser, still a nobleman right?, found a diamond mine, getting into British politics, car sound, bolted down, packing in, Clifford Simak, The Ablest Man In The World by Edward Page Mitchell, cyborg short story, unscrew the top of head, public domain Asimovs, The Man That Was Used Up by Edgar Allan Poe, 1839, no electronics, 19th century cyborgs, replacing body parts, lots of French, A Tale Of The Late Bugaboo and Kickapoo Campaign, all his body parts are artificial, the brain, compare and contrast, Sunfire by Francis Stevens, from Weird Tales, no previous experience, just did it, couple hours, read stories around with the kid, Treasure Island, before people started this let’s read on our ebooks, people read aloud, snitches and snatches about Poe and Dickens, I read this aloud to my wife and now she’s mad, everyone should do it, why not Mona, Sweet Slow Death, Grifter’s Game, hooks her on heroine, 145 pages.

The Valley Of Spiders by H.G. Wells

Valley Of The Lost - ad in Strange Tales

Valley Of The Lost by Robert E. Howard

Posted by Jesse Willis