Review of The Ice Is Singing By James Patrick Kelly

The Ice Is Singing
By James Patrick Kelly; Read By James Patrick Kelly
FREE DOWNLOAD – 12 Minutes MP3 (4.96MB) [UNABRIDGED]
Publisher: www.jimkelly.net/pages/free_reads.htm
Published: April 2004
Themes: / Fantasy / Modern / Poetry /

“The man in the ice is wearing a blue three-piece suit. He is facing up at you and the bright sky and his eyes are open. What does he see? Nothing. He’s dead, no? You look around the lake. None of the other skaters seem to realize that there’s a man frozen in the ice on Christmas Day. Someone could do a sit spin right on his nose, a triple lutz from his head to his black, tasseled loafers. Except nobody on the lake is that good a skater. Certainly not you.”

“The Ice Is Singing” was first published in Realms Of Fantasy magazine’s April 2003 issue. It’s told in the second person, making the protagonist “you”. This gives it a very “choose your own adventure” feel as do most second person narratives – the effect is like a cross between virtual reality and a rail shooter. Overall, it works very well with this one, which has a very good twist at the end, even if one an attentive listener may have seen coming. Production values and sound quality are great, with an exceptional musical accompaniment to Kelly’s excellent reading. As with all the James Kelly Free Reads stories “The Ice Is Singing” is essentially shareware. You can copy it for friends, email it, and even burn it to disc all for free. Kelly only asks that if you enjoy the story you consider donating to his PayPal account. And you really can’t ask for more than that. Well worth the listen!

Posted by Jesse Willis

Review of Voyage by Stephen Baxter

Science Fiction Audio Drama - Voyage by Stephen BaxterVoyage
By Stephen Baxter; Directed/Produced by Dirk Maggs, Performed by a Full Cast
2 Cassettes – 2 hours [AUDIO DRAMA]
Publisher: BBC Audiobooks
Published: May 1999
ISBN: 0563552417
THEMES: / Science Fiction / Alternate History / Space Program / Mars / Moon / Politics /

Voyage is a work of alternate history, in which the seed is President John F. Kennedy’s survival of the attempted assassination in Dallas in 1963. The impact of this historical change on the United States Space Program is the focus of the story.

In one of the many striking scenes in this audio drama, a wheelchair bound Kennedy joins president Nixon in the Oval Office in sending a message of congratulations to Neil Armstrong and crew during the first moon landing. But Kennedy takes it a little farther than a simple greeting – he challenges humanity to go farther. He challenges NASA to send people to Mars. Nixon at first is appalled, then goes along with the program after an aide tells him the voters love the idea.

The story is about the struggle from that point on to send people to Mars, building up to and including the story of Project Ares, which lifts off in 1986 with a three-person crew headed for Mars.

Dirk Maggs directed the production which was absolutely first-rate. I put on a pair of headphones and was instantly taken away to this alternate history. I enjoyed every minute of it. I’d even go so far as to say that it solidified the power of audio drama to my ears – I couldn’t help but to think of the many excellent works of science fiction that could – and SHOULD – be done in this medium.

I also agree with the message of the story. It’s a unconscionable that humanity reached the moon 35 years ago and has gone nowhere since. Let’s get on with our own history!

Posted by Scott D. Danielson

Review of Vitals By Greg Bear

Science Fiction Audiobooks - Vitals by Greg BearVitals
By Greg Bear; Read by Jeff Woodman
3 Cassettes – 5 hours 16 minutes [ABRIDGED]
Publisher: Random House Audio
Published: January 2002
ISBN: 0553714953
THEMES: / Science Fiction / Genetic Engineering / Immortality /

The edge of immortality is the deadliest place of all…Hal Cousins is one of a handful of scientists nearing the most sought after discovery in human history: the key to short-circuiting the aging process. Fueled by a wealth of research, an overdose of self-confidence, and the money of influential patrons to whom he makes outrageous promises, Hal experiments with organisms living in the hot thermal plumes in the ocean depths. But as he journeys beneath the sea, his other world is falling apart.

I like Greg Bear’s work, I really do. Or at least I did before listening to Vitals. I truly savored previous Greg Bear audiobooks, the novels Blood Music and Queen Of Angels and the collection of his short work entitled The Wind From A Burning Woman are all really great listens even though somewhat difficult to follow. Unfortunately Vitals sounds more intriguing in theory than it is in execution. I really cannot think of a single good thing to say about the novel’s construction. It takes the interesting ideas from Blood Music and then ineffectually recycles them into an aimless plodding story. The central conceit, that bacteria are taking over the world in an unpredictable way, is blatantly stolen from Blood Music, Bear’s best work. But Bear doesn’t refine his ideas, instead he adds in a completely bizarre character viewpoint switch in the middle of the story, and later another non-sequitor changes the time period for even more exposition, backing and filling to detrimental effect.

What’s worse, Bear decides to eliminate what few interesting characters there are and finally puts us out of our misery with an unresolved ending. Vitals is like a bad action movie jumping from one scene to another without rhyme or reason. It’s one big train wreck of a novel. Bear has truly fallen and he can’t get up!

This is an abridgement and surely we could argue that a bad abridgement can really hurt an audiobook, but somehow I doubt adding more words to this mess could have helped. Jeff Woodman did his best with what he was given; his narration was very good and clear, with distinct characterization of voices. The cover art falls into the category of “bland non-specific” which so pervades novels these days.

Posted by Jesse Willis

Review of Bernardo’s House by James Patrick Kelly

Science Fiction Audiobooks - Bernardo's House by James Patrick KellyBernardo’s House
By James Patrick Kelly; Read By James Patrick Kelly
FREE MP3 DOWNLOAD (link to jimkelly.net) – 1 Hour (26.97 MB) [UNABRIDGED]
Publisher: www.jimkelly.net
Published: April 2004
Themes: Science Fiction / Post Apocalypse / Robots / Artificial Intelligence / Sexuality / Fairy Tales /

“Once on time,” said the girl, “Louise lives in that castle. Louise’s Mom dies, don’t say where her Dad goes. So Louise stuck with spang bitch taking care of her. That Louise castle got no door, only windows high and high. Now Louise got most hair.” Fly spread her arms wide. “Hair big as trees. When spang bitch want in, she call Louise. ‘Louise, Louise, let down buzzy hair.’ Then spang bitch climb it up.”

In the future women will come in all shapes and sizes but men will still be pigs. This is especially true about a philandering homewrecker named Bernardo. Bernardo left 3 years ago, leaving poor Louise alone with no one to talk to… until a young girl named “Fly” arrived. James Patrick Kelly’s hilarious stories never fail to bring a smile to my face and “Bernardo’s House” is no exception. Kelly tends to write very funny personal stories, charged with human and sometimes alien emotions – his recurring themes include biological problems and ethical dilemmas. Kelly also has a great fondness for inventing new words; he is in fact a raving neologist. But all these traits are completely in service to his stories, and in the case of “Bernardo’s House”, the comedic situation and the main character’s apprehension of it is truly tempered by our own baggage that we bring to the experience, turning a story that starts out as fluff into a bittersweet morality tale. “Bernardo’s House” was first published in Asimov’s Science Fiction, June 2003 issue, and at this writing is a finalist for the Hugo Award.

Sound quality and production values are excellent. Kelly is a real performer! He infuses his reading with a bouncy upbeat tone that makes the funny scenes even funnier. But the very best part about “Bernardo’s House” is that its available for FREE! Kelly only asks that if you enjoyed hearing this tale you consider making a donation to his PayPal account, donations encourage future recordings so it’s a real positive feedback loop!

Posted by Jesse Willis

Review of A Taste Of Damsel By Tom Gerencer

A Taste Of Damsel
By Tom Gerencer; Read by Tom Gerencer
MP3 DOWNLOAD – 14 minutes, 56 seconds [UNABRIDGED]
Publisher: Telltale Weekly
Published: 2004
Themes: Fantasy / Humor / Dragons /

Anyone can slay a dragon. Well, provided they are dragonslayers, which Colson isn’t. But even clerks from copy shops can have heroic qualities and even the very, very old can learn new tricks.

First published in the August 2002 issue of Realms of Fantasy magazine, “A Taste Of Damsel” is mirthful look into the epicurian philosophy of dragons. It is read by the author, Tom Gerencer, who narrates at too fast a clip. The range in voices is minimal and unfortunately a slight background hiss marrs the recording. Despite all that, this audio download is a good value and at $0.75 USD. “A Taste Of Damsel” is fine, if lightweight, fantasy fare. Available online at Telltale Weekly.

Posted by Jesse Willis

Review of The Adventures of Red Cloud

Science Fiction Audio Drama - The Adventures of Red Cloud starring Traci Elizabeth LordsThe Adventures of Red Cloud
By Larry Weiner; performed by a full cast
2 CDs – 2 hours [AUDIO DRAMA]
Publisher: Radio Repertory Company of America
Published: 2004
ISBN: 0966039297
Themes: / Science Fiction / Audio Drama / Espionage / Piracy / Prostitution / Humor /

The Adventures of Red Cloud is an audio drama starring Traci Elizabeth Lords, Brinke Stevens, and James C. Leary, along with a full cast and crew. Traci Elizabeth Lords is mesmerizing as the sexy Wendy McCloud, who trades professions – from hooker to spy – in order to find her father’s killer. Lords is both funny and sultry as her character fights anger management problems and uses her feminine wiles to infiltrate the inner circle of a group of pirates and achieve her vengeful goals.

The script is witty, and all of the actors turn in nice performances. The score works well, and the effects professionally done. What’s not to like? I found this audio drama very entertaining and am looking forward to more from the Radio Repertory Company of America.

Posted by Scott D. Danielson