Themes: / evil genius / world domination / humor /
“Intergalactic Menace. Destroyer of Worlds. Conqueror of Other Worlds. Mad Genius. Ex-Warlord of Earth. Not bad for a guy without a spine. But what’s a villain to do after he’s done . . . everything. With no new ambitions, he’s happy to pitch in and solve the energy crisis or repel alien invaders should the need arise, but if he had his way, he’d prefer to be left alone to explore the boundaries of dangerous science. Just as a hobby, of course. Retirement isn’t easy though. If the boredom doesn’t get him, there’s always the Venusians. Or the Saturnites. Or the Mercurials. Or . . . well, you get the idea. If that wasn’t bad enough, there are also the assassins of a legendary death cult and an up-and-coming megalomaniac (as brilliant as he is bodiless) who have marked Emperor for their own nefarious purposes. But Mollusk isn’t about to let the Earth slip out of his own tentacles and into the less capable clutches of another. So it’s time to dust off the old death ray and come out of retirement. Except this time, he’s not out to rule the world. He’s out to save it from the peril of…THE SINISTER BRAIN!”
“But, history is written by the winners. Especially winners with access to global mind control devices.”
This line toward the beginning of the book is just one of the many lines from Emperor Mollusk versus The Sinister Brain that had me chuckling to myself.
Emperor Mollusk is a Neptunan who has done it all when it comes to defeating and subjugating races, ruling in tyranny and oppression, and downright being evil. Neptunans are the most intelligent of the solar system, at least according to them (and that’s really all that matters right?), but kind of all look the same, in fact they can barely tell each other apart, let alone who their clones are, and they are mollusks (think octopus for those like me who didn’t love biology classes).
Of course it gets boring after a while being the mad genius and having everyone around you worship the ground you allow your mechanical suit to walk on. That is until someone tries to assassinate you. I guess that’s not all true because one of the things I found hilarious was how Emperor Mollusk keeps walking into dangerous situations because he actually thinks there’s no way for anyone to outsmart him.
Then there are the different societies based on which planet they are from. Minor spoiler warning for this sentence: Those from essentially Earth are highly litigious (of course) and there’s a great scene where they save the day and in going to help one of the wounded, a law suit is threatened.
This was a really fun book and my first by the author, I will definitely be going back to A. Lee Martinez in the future. There are some authors who can just go from one line to the next and keep you not only amused but chucking from time to time. A few I can think of are Terry Pratchett and Douglas Adams and I’m in awe of their talent. Martinez may not be quite to their level, but he’s right up there.
Here’s another where Mollusk is attacked by a group of Venusians who are a highly honor-bound society who won’t give up no matter how difficult the task or how much they are injured:
“The female did give me a kick. Considering she could barely breath that’s probably worth a commendation or something. ‘Bravery in the face of foolish short-sightedness’ or something. I assume there’s such an award on Venus though it probably has a less accurate name.”
I think these lines were even better because of the great job Scott Aiello does in this audiobook. He’s got Mollusk’s sharp, but oblivious character down pat. One of the signs of a great narrator is when you stop noticing he’s even there and that’s Aiello all the way.
Emperor Mollusk is a hilarious character, this book kept reminding me of the movie Megamind with Will Farrell and I’m sure you can guess why if you’ve seen it (highly recommended btw!). Again, this will not be my last Martinez book, I’m looking forward to jumping into the rest.
4 out of 5 Stars (highly recommended)
Posted by Bryce L.