The Ideal Girl by Robert E. Howard

SFFaudio Online Audio

One of Robert E. Howard’s first publications here is The Ideal Girl.

The Ideal Girl by Robert E. Howard

Here’s the text:

“In the first place, she should be at least six feet tall and weigh about two hundred pounds, so she could take in washing or coal heaving at wharfs, while I took a vacation. As beauty is apt to make a woman vain, she should have a face that resembled a female crocodile with hippopotamus ancestors. As to hair, eyes and so on, I have no especial preference, but if she squinted with one ye and goggled with the other, it would be all right. Also, she should have a strong Swedish accent.”

And here’s a reading by John Feaster |MP3|

First published in The Tattler (the newspaper of Brownwood High School), January 6, 1925.

Posted by Jesse Willis

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