The Ideal Girl by Robert E. Howard

SFFaudio Online Audio

One of Robert E. Howard’s first publications here is The Ideal Girl.

The Ideal Girl by Robert E. Howard

Here’s the text:

“In the first place, she should be at least six feet tall and weigh about two hundred pounds, so she could take in washing or coal heaving at wharfs, while I took a vacation. As beauty is apt to make a woman vain, she should have a face that resembled a female crocodile with hippopotamus ancestors. As to hair, eyes and so on, I have no especial preference, but if she squinted with one ye and goggled with the other, it would be all right. Also, she should have a strong Swedish accent.”

And here’s a reading by John Feaster |MP3|

First published in The Tattler (the newspaper of Brownwood High School), January 6, 1925.

Posted by Jesse Willis

The Pit And The Pendulum by Edgar Allan Poe (as read by Xe Sands)

SFFaudio Online Audio

Xe Sands recorded this classic horror story as a Halloween treat – and we certainly appreciate it, but I couldn’t help but laugh the maniacal laughter of a monomaniac when I learned that although the story was indeed originally published in October, 170 years ago, it was actually published as a Christmas story!

The Pit And The Pendulum was first published in The Gift, a Christmas And New Year’s Present for 1843.

And here’s Byam Shaw’s chilling illustration, again not particularly Christmasy, from Selected Tales Of Mystery:
The Pit And The Pendulum - illustrated by Byam Shaw

[Thanks Xe!]

Posted by Jesse Willis

The Diamond Maker by H.G. Wells

SFFaudio Online Audio

The Diamond Maker by H.G. Wells - illustration by Frank R. Paul

Everett F. Bleiler, in Science Fiction, The Early Years, described The Diamond Maker as a tale of “science fiction by implication” – but there’s another way of looking at it too. You could argue that it’s just the story of an unsuccessful heel grifter, with a tall tale and a gaffed prop, who puts on the Send.

I like it either way.

LibriVoxThe Diamond Maker
By H.G. Wells; Read by Jerome Lawsen
1 |MP3| – Approx. 17 Minutes [UNABRIDGED]
Publisher: LibriVox.org
Published: July 25, 2008
First published in the Pall Mall Budget, August 16, 1894.

Voices In The DarkThe Diamond Maker
By H.G. Wells; Read by Sean Puckett
1 |MP3| – Approx. 16 Minutes [UNABRIDGED]
Publisher: Voices In The Dark
Published: 2004/2005
After a long day’s work, our narrator meets a beggar while contemplating the peacefulness of the river embankment. First published in the Pall Mall Budget, August 16, 1894.

Here’s a |PDF| made from the story’s appearance in Science Wonder Stories, June 1929.

And here’s a short film noir style adaptation:

The Diamond Maker from Sean Phillips on Vimeo.

Posted by Jesse Willis

BBCR4+RA.cc: Metropolis (2006) RADIO DRAMA

SFFaudio Online Audio

Ace Books F-246 - Metropolis by Thea Von Harbou

The Tower of Babylon in MetropolisI wrote about it airing six year ago, but I’ve just now heard it.

Metropolis, an astoundingly great radio dramatization of a famous novel that was turned into a famous movie, is nuanced, deep, surprising, and totally, idea based.

I’m astounded, really and truly astounded and amazed too at the depth and power an hour long program is able to achieve.

The script has humor, skepticism, cynicism, hope, sex, romance, informative infodumps, and a city full of pathos.

The production, acting, pacing, and composite audio experience is completely awe inspiring.

What gets me most is that even though it is based on a 1926 novel by Thea von Harbou, this version of Metropolis is, arguably, even more relevant than either Brave New World (1931) or 1984 (1949).

Those two classics don’t feel wholly and completely modern – this production of Metropolis does. It’s modernity is ripe, it’s like an episode of Black Mirror, and it should be on your radar.

Still not sold? Then imagine a Science Fiction version of Fight Club but set in the world of The Space Merchants or Judge Dredd and imagine it written by either Philip K. Dick or Frederik Pohl.

Here’s a review by Elisabeth Mahoney of The Guardian:

An audacious portrayal of a futuristic city as much as a state of mind, and an iconic film to boot, Metropolis (Radio 4, Friday) doesn’t exactly scream radio adaptation. But writer Peter Straughan and director Toby Swift, who won the Prix Italia in 2004 for their adaptation of Fritz Lang’s M, clearly aren’t put off by such hurdles. Their Metropolis was all deliciously claustrophobic intensity and dark interiority; their mega-city full of bubbling, menacing sounds you soon wanted to shut out. Without the famous visuals, you never really got a sense of the scale of Lang’s vision – you didn’t believe in the 62 million workers in Metropolis – but you did get the chilling psychological dimension of the dystopia. Edward Hogg, as Freddy, though sounding like a young Woody Allen at times, convinced as the alienated, lonely outsider who manages to subvert the mega-state from within. There were laughs, too, at least early on. “When was the last time you slept?” a therapist asks a suicidal Freddy. “About eight years ago,” says Freddy. “No,” the therapist concludes, “I don’t think that’s significant.”

Peter Straughan, the adaptor, and Toby Swift, the director, have achieved a classic for our time and for the ages – this is highly, highly recommended!

BBC Radio 4RadioArchives.ccThea von Harbou’s MetropolisSFFaudio Essential
Adapted by Peter Straughan; Performed by a full cast
MP3 via TORRENT – 57 Minutes [RADIO DRAMA]
Broadcaster: BBC Radio 4 (Friday Drama)
Broadcast: March 24, 2006
Available via RadioArchive.cc
Freder, the protagonist of Metropolis is an underworked “captain” in a high level position in the futuristic consumer society of the mega city named Metropolis. Feeling suicidal, but unable to understand why, Fredor switches identities with a low level “product insertion” – a kind of telemarketing – but failing at that Fredor soon finds himself working for Maria, an imperfect beauty with all the answers. Maria plunges Fredor into the depths of her underground conspiracy to disrupt the workings of society.

Directed by Toby Swift

Cast:
Freder – Edward Hogg
Maria – Tracy Wiles
Josaphat – Damian Lynch
Schmale – Peter Marinker

Michael W. Kaluta illustration of Maria and Freder

Posted by Jesse Willis

[Use Omitron! Omitron, use it! Use Omitron, it’s great!]

Earbud Theater: Clang! by Casey Wolfe AUDIO DRAMA

SFFaudio Online Audio

Earbud TheaterEarbud Theater has a new show they want you to hear. Written by Casey Wolfe, it’s entitled CLANG! and it features a cast you may recognize from other podcasts and movies and elsewhere around the universe.

Have a listen: |MP3|

Here’s the official description:

As any parent knows, balancing work and family can be difficult to say the least. For Gern and Betty Steadfast the two are about to slam together with a great… big… CLANG!

Cast:
Stephen Tobolowsky as Gern Steadfast
Meeghan Holoway as Betty Steadfast
Sean Keller as The General & Gabriel Edgar Wech
Alex Wagner as Jenni & Ellie
Lindsay Zana as Tyler & Jack

Earbud Theater - CLANG! - illustration by Megan Hutchinson

Posted by Jesse Willis

BrokenSea: 2109: Black Sun Rising [AUDIO DRAMA]

SFFaudio Online Audio

BrokenSea Audio Productions: 2109: Black Sun RisingMy friend, Bill Hollweg, has posted the first episode of his new original Science Fiction audio drama series 2109: Black Sun Rising. Produced for BrokenSea Audio Productions, the show makes extensive use of the stereo format (so be sure to use headphones or widely spaced speakers while listening). Also present are a many allusive character names, a plethora of familiar voice actors, and a teensy bit of harsh language.

Here’s the 2109: Black Sun Rising – Episode 1 |MP3|

Posted by Jesse Willis